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my profile for standard members
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Posted:Jul 9, 2017 5:28 pm
Last Updated:May 9, 2024 9:16 pm
3159 Views
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Introduction
I'm a retired bureaucrat who still spends way too much time on the computer.
I'd like to think I know how to treat a lady right, and that I make good company. I'm a pretty good listener, but will contribute my share of the conversation. I try to establish an environment which we both can enjoy - If you're not happy, I'm not happy.
I've never been shaped like Barbie's Ken, but I have been called attractive. I'll let you be the judge on that score.
My Ideal Person Intelligence and sense of humor are important to me. I want to like, and enjoy the company of the woman I am with.
I prefer curves to bones. Rubens understood beauty.
She won't care that I'm grey on top or that I'm carrying a spare tire, but will care that I have a brain and know how to please the woman I am with.
Information
Sexual Orientation: Straight
Looking For: Women
Birthdate: November 5, 1950
Hometown: Moreland, ID, United States
Relocate?: No
Marital Status: Separated
Swinger Type: Not applicable
Height: 5 ft 8 in
Body Type: A little extra padding (a spare tire)
Smoking: I'm a non-smoker
Drinking: I don't drink at all
Drugs: Don't use Drugs
Education: Master's degree
Occupation: retired bureaucrat
Race: Caucasian
Religion: Agnostic
Have : Yes - at home partly
Want : Happy with what they have
Male Endowment: Average / Average
Circumcised: Yes
Speaks: English
Hair Color: Silver
Hair Length: Medium
Glasses or Contacts: Glasses
Eye Color: Hazel
Astrology: Scorpio (Compatibility)
Personality Type:
The Innovator
Purity: 49% Pure
My Kinks
You currently have no kinks
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infrequent postings.
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Posted:Dec 12, 2014 9:21 am
Last Updated:May 4, 2015 11:07 pm
8306 Views
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I will probably not be posting very often any more, both due to a lack of time, and some technical problems. The network I usually use to access VisionPersonals.com now blocks access to the site, so... postings will be very infrequent
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Getting on the bandwagon
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Posted:Dec 3, 2014 2:49 pm
Last Updated:Dec 12, 2014 9:13 am
8992 Views
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I saw this on Fun_tchr’s blog [post 3534847] so I’m copying it
McManiac Getting On The Bandwagon posted this so I'm gonna post too
Getting On The Bandwagon
This is a get to know me post.
~4 Jobs I've had:
1. Advisor to public official
2. Energy conservation/renewable energy program manager
3. Newspaper publisher
4. Economic development coordinator
~4 Movies I've seen more than once:
1. MASH
2. Big
3. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance
4. American President
~4 Places I've lived: ( these are in order)
1. A farm in eastern Idaho
2. Terre Haute, IN
3. Madison, WI
4. Boise, ID
5. Portland, OR
6. Garden Valley, ID
7. Boise, ID
~4 TV shows I'm currently following
1. none
2.
3.
4.
~4 Places I have been:
1. Europe
2. Canada
3. Mexico
4. 45 of lower 48 states
~4 People who email me regularly:
0. Spammers
1. My wife
2. My
3. Washington Post
4. My ’s mother
~4 of my favorite foods:
1. Potatoes
2. Beef broiled
3. Beef fried
4. Diet cola
5. Cookies
~4 Places I would rather be:
1. Oregon coast
2. The mountains
3. Switzerland
4. Canada mountains (Banff)
~4 Things I'm Looking Forward to in 2015:
1. Moving closer to work
2. One year closer to retirement
3. The end of being my ’s chauffeur – he gets his license
4. Summer camping
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Marriage and wants
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Posted:Nov 5, 2014 1:57 pm
Last Updated:May 4, 2015 11:11 pm
9171 Views
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MnSweet posted a list of her “wants” [post 3517379] and it’s a good list. Things that just about everybody wants from life, though not necessarily what they want from VisionPersonals.com.
I certainly want all of those things. And of course I think I would provide all those things to my partner.
I notice that her list does not include marriage. What I want, is a relationship that satisfies all of those wants, but doesn’t include the ties of a legal marriage – at least not for an extended period of time. (I think. My thoughts on this seem to change and go back and forth.)
I’m not really against marriage. After all, I’ve enjoyed most of three of them. But in my experience, I have received the things on her list from each of my previous spouses (and long term partners), yet they were not enough to keep the relationships alive. In each of my marriages, especially the last two, issues arose after the marriage that led to failures, in spite of the relationships providing all of those wants.
In my current marriage, we get along fine when it’s just the two of us, but our differences about raising has become a real problem since my moved in with us. I feel like I’m being forced to choose between her and my . If there were signals that this might have been a problem before we married, I certainly missed them.
I’m fairly certain that if we were not married, I would have left her and I believe we could have parted as friends. The hassles and costs of a divorce is one of the primary reasons I stay with her. But I’m pretty sure none of us are really happy, and I fear we are not going to be ending as friends.
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Inappropriate Temptations
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Posted:Oct 31, 2014 3:30 pm
Last Updated:Nov 4, 2014 9:40 am
11485 Views
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I’m posting early as I won’t be by a computer tomorrow.
I suppose the most inappropriate temptation I succumbed to was the sex that led to my extramarital affair. After my first divorce, the first woman I dated was someone I met at the library. She was a lot of fun, and loved sex. It was the first time I’d ever been with anyone who wanted sex as much, or more, than me. What a change.
I visited the library every Wednesday for a weekly project, and she was a part time employee who worked there most Wednesdays. We’d had numerous conversations over the months, mostly about local politics and goings on. After my divorce, I figured she'd be a good choice for a first date.
When we got to her house after our first date, I was walking her to the door, and she pulled me to the side of her house, so her couldn’t see us, and started making out. To say she was the aggressor would be an understatement. The next thing I knew, she had my pants unzipped and was giving me a blow job. I didn’t object. As it had been six months months since I’d had sex, I came rather quickly, and she clearly wanted more. I tried to unzip her jeans to give my fingers access to her tender parts, but she stopped me, and placed them on the outside of her jeans, but right over her clit. So I started rubbing away, and within seconds, she was very, VERY, aroused. It was hard to stay on target as she was squirming around so much. But it didn’t take long till she came, hard, and loud enough that not only her daughters, but probably the whole neighborhood heard her.
I was impressed, and figured she was definitely worth another date. The next day she paid me a visit at my home, and this time we did it in a bed. By the next weekend, we were meeting daily for sex. During the time we were dating, one of our frequent activities was for me to finger her when we were together in the car, bringing her to climax. When summer came around, it became a challenge to time things so that she experienced her climax just when we arrived at our destination or when we were stopped at a stop light, so that those around us could easily figure out what was going on. She was very fun to tease like that. I enjoyed touching her butt, boobs, and crotch in public, as she would act offended, but also obviously enjoyed it. (I confirmed this by asking if she wanted me to stop doing it, to which she said no.)
But other than the sex, we weren’t that compatible, and when I started dating wife number 2, we broke up. As it was a small town, we continued seeing each other, but other than the occasional conversation, nothing went on.
After three or four years however, she became friends with my wife, and they even commuted to college classes together, which put us together even more frequently. One day she stopped by my office and asked me to go get a coke with her. She was having trouble with math, and since she knew I’d helped my wife with that assignment, asked for similar help. That led to other coke breaks, and then to the occasional lunch.
And of course, we eventually ended up talking about sex. She and my wife had obviously shared lots of stories. And, of course, the conversations led to some teasing touching, grabbing her butt when we walked, brushing against her boobs as I reached for something, and on rare occasions, rubbing her crotch for a few seconds. I kept it to just touching as an obvious tease.
One day, she was really responding to the teasing, and we joked about how horny she was. As we were driving back to my office, I teased her with a finger rub to the crotch, and she immediately started squirming. I joked that she was so horny that I could probably get her off by the time we got back to my office. When she didn’t move my hand away, I assumed she had accepted the challenge, and I pursued her climax with vigor. She came a few blocks before my office. That broke the ice, and on most future visits, I repeated the challenge as we traveled back to the office.
I started stopping by her home on my way home, ostensibly to use her bathroom, and one time I got her off on her couch. (Her 20 yr old came out of her room soon after and asked her mom if it was as good as it sounded.) This was followed by the challenge of getting her off in a restaurant booth. Then a clothing store dressing room. I justified it as simply teasing, and therefore not cheating on my wife.
One day I passed her car on the drive home from work. She soon caught up with me and motioned me to pull over. We stopped a viewpoint, and I joined her in her car. We talked for a while, and she said it was time for her to repay all the finger jobs I had given her. I initially objected, as I didn’t view it as sex, but as teasing, but … I’m not good at passing up the offer of a blow job, and she was very good at them. It was as enjoyable as I remembered.
A couple weeks later I passed her car again, and she again motioned me to pull over. I got in her car, and we drove to a secluded spot. She had a minivan, and had put a mattress in the back to use for naps between classes at school. One thing led to another, and she invited me to the back, and the sex was also just as good as I’d remembered it.
We ended up meeting on the road a few more times, and then, one time I had stopped by her home her girls were not at home, and we took advantage of her bed. After that, her girls were gone about once a month. It had clearly advanced beyond teasing.
When my wife got pregnant, I decided things had to change. I stopped by her house and we agreed it would be best if we ended it. Shortly after that she moved to Seattle, so the temptation was essentially gone.
A couple years later I had a business trip to Seattle. I thought we could just meet for dinner after my meetings. And if I’d have avoided the temptation to tease, it probably would have just been dinner. But I didn’t, and we ended up in my room. We went at it again and again. I was only good for a few times, but as I remembered, she was a bottomless pit of orgasms. I think my tongue and fingers were tired for a week.
A few months later, I heard she had moved back to Boise, but I didn’t look her up. But a couple years later she looked me up. She wanted advice on an issue with her parents estate, and knew I’d dealt with estates when my parents died. e met at a rstaurant for lunch. She talked about the apartment complex she was managing, and made me promise I would come see it. Again, if I’d have avoided the temptation to tease, it would have probably ended with the advice, but I couldn’t resist. As I put her in her car, I leaned in to give her a kiss, and placed my hand in her crotch for a finger tease. She was so moist I could feel it through her skirt. I pulled up the skirt, and surprise, no panties. Moments later she was screaming in climax.
She called me the next week, said she was showing an apartment that night, and it would be a good time to show me the complex. I stopped by on my way home, got the tour, and before leaving, asked if I could use her bathroom. When I came out, she was lying on the bed naked. That is a temptation I’ve never passed up. As I had an hour drive ahead of me, and was already later than expected, we made it a quickie. But the ice had been broken again. We met a few weeks later for an hour long session, and an even longer one a couple weeks after that.
After that, my wife found out, and as a condition of my probation, I send the woman an email that left no doubt that it was over for good.
From the first math lesson to the ending email, the affair lasted over 7 years. But it was really two separate and much shorter periods. During that time, we probably had full sex about a dozen times, and probably an equal number of times when I only teased her to a climax. That’s probably me trying to minimize what I did, but I know it was wrong and inappropriate.
What I had not realized was the hurt and pain that my actions would cause my wife. We weren’t getting along that well during either period, but that is no excuse. I never intended to cause that much pain. I promised myself I would never cause anyone that much pain again, and so far, I’ve kept that promise.
So, what am I doing on a site like VisionPersonals.com? I guess it is just another one of those inappropriate temptations.
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halloween memories
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Posted:Oct 31, 2014 12:27 pm
Last Updated:Nov 3, 2014 12:27 pm
9272 Views
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One of the memories I have from when I was under 10 years old is trick or treating. In the rural area where I grew up, we knew every family on the trick or treat route, and eventually had a good idea of the treats that we would get at each house. All the houses were at least a mile apart, and we went by car. We generally went inside each house, often would get our pictures taken, and generally stayed long enough that our driver (usually dad) had a bit of a conversation with the mom (the dad would be driving their ) of the house. We often ate the treat while waiting, especially the early houses. We hit less than a dozen homes, taking a couple hours, but the treats were so generous, we still got huge a sugar high.
My favorite was Mrs B, a deaf woman, who spoke with an odd pronunciation which was kinda scary to me when I was young. She made delicious caramel apples. She was childless, and the tradition was that we had to go into her kitchen and converse with her while we ate the apple, and if we finished it, she gave us another that was wrapped up so we could put it in our bag. They were so good, we always talked long enough to finish them.
Mrs Y and R made cupcakes, Mrs S and Mrs B2 made cookies, and we'd get 5 or 6 cookies wrapped up or in a sandwich bag from each of them. Mrs G made divinity, and Mrs T made fudge. My mom made huge lollipops, about 6" across and a half inch thick. Mrs H made brownies. Mrs T and Mrs D made popcorn balls. I don't remember who else, but I do remember cake and we got Ice cream cones and hot chocolate at one house.
You'll notice that no one gave us purchased treats. This was before the scares of poisoned treats or razor blades in apples. I think halloween lost a lot when homemade treats became suspicious.
When I was in the 5th grade, the community/school started holding a halloween carnival, which was supposed to be in lieu of trick or treating. (although we still went to 3 or 4 homes). The idea was to keep off the street and out of trouble. Lots of booths with games - balloons and darts, fishing tents, musical chairs, etc. No charge to play, and you could play as many times as you liked, so ended up with as much candy as they would have going door to door. Some of the treats were homemade, but some purchased as well.
I think it just concentrated the cars and into an area where the peer pressure led to more problems - at least in my case. One year I got caught soaping car windows and drug in front of my parents. The next year I got a black eye from a guy whose car window I attempted to soap. I didn't even check to see if anyone was in the car, and he and a girl were making out in the back seat. He came out and popped me a good one, sending me to my butt. I wasn't going to tell my folks about it, but the black eye the next morning took care of that.
I wouldn't have even thought about soaping cars or other "tricks" if it hadn't been for the other doing it and the pressure to fit in.
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The one that got away
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Posted:Oct 6, 2014 11:11 am
Last Updated:Oct 10, 2014 8:57 am
9655 Views
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Intendadiversion posted a question about “the one that got away ([post 3497526]). My response was getting long, so I thought I’d put it in my blog instead.
I responded that I regret letting my first marriage fail, but I don’t think my first wife was “the one”.
I don't believe there is only one. Maybe for some, but not for most of us. I think we can find happiness and be fulfilled with many different people. If someone is close enough to "the one" (whatever that is), if we have a significant degree of compatibility, then if we both try hard enough, we can make the relationship successful. We just have to keep working at it.
So why have I failed at two, and probably three, marriages? Were they not close enough to my "one", or did I not try hard enough? I believe I failed to try hard enough with number 1, and number two (and 3?) was too far from my "one" to really be compatible.
I now believe my first marriage failed because we stopped working on the marriage. We were together over 20 years, and in the end, we both were looking for something more. Instead of working to get more out of our relationship, we sought that more from others. There were other problems – financial issues and my inability to stay with a job, but I do believe those could have been overcome. We stopped trying, and we fell out of love with each other.
When she told me she wanted to separate, I didn’t fight it. I was chasing someone else, and I suspected she was interested in someone else as well. When she asked for a divorce, I realized I had made a mistake, but it was too late.
She eventually married the person she was interested in, and they are still married. The person I was chasing told me it would never work and went back to her husband. That forced me to take a more realistic look, and I soon realized she was right.
I jumped into a relationship with my second wife too quickly and failed to really get to know her. In spite of our differences, which were substantial, that marriage lasted 13 years. It almost ended after year 3, but she got pregnant, so I stayed. And that’s when I learned the importance of working on the relationship. In spite of our considerable differences and incompatibilities, we lasted another 10 years, and most of them were fairly happy. We remain good friends, which is good for our , but we don’t belong together. We both know that – now.
I thought I had taken enough time to get to know wife number 3. We dated over 6 months before moving in together, and then waited another year before tying the knot. Things weren’t perfect, but they were pretty positive until my moved in with us. We really have different approaches to raising a , and those differences have made other differences more apparent. I don’t know if those differences will be enough to end this marriage as well. Time will tell.
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Are we living to an over-ripe age?
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Posted:Sep 22, 2014 11:08 am
Last Updated:Oct 8, 2014 11:15 am
10020 Views
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I recently read an article by a Dr. who wants to die when he reaches 75. http://VisionPersonals.com.com
He doesn’t plan to take any actions to end his life; he opposes euthanasia, but he does plan to forgo options that would extend his life after he reached 75. No more antibiotics, no treatments to cure diseases he might get, just measures to make him comfortable. What he refers to as palliative care but not curative care.
He’s in good health now, recently climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro, and in his late 50s. So why 75?
He figures that by then he will have lived a good life, accomplished most, if not all, of what he might be able to accomplish, and that it’s a good time to let go. He claims we live longer not because our medicine is extending life, but because it is delaying death. He provides statistics and studies that show that most of us will have declining memories, declining creativity, less energy, and more aches, pains and disabilities as we get older, especially after 75.
Another big factor for him is that he wants his ’s and grandchildren’s menories of him to be of when he is active and robust, rather than declining and a burden. And he definitely does not want to be a burden, physically or financially to them.
As I’ve approached retirement, I’ve increasingly thought about what my life will be like as I get older. The last ten years has seen an exponential increase in the number of visits to the Dr, and the aches and pains are multiplying. I carry around a bag of pills that is embarrassing, yet I don’t take everything that has been recommended. I study the documentation and only take what I truly believe is necessary.
I must also acknowledge that my diet and exercise level does not help. More exercise and fewer calories is advised, but more difficult than I ever imagined to accomplish, and getting harder each year that passes.
While my pains are essentially constant, they are not yet debilitating. I still function quite normally. Yet, I have wondered if there will come a time when I will question whether life is worth continuing.
Do I want to live another 20 or 30 years? Would 75 (11 years from now) be enough? I don’t know the answer to the question, but I think it’s a good thing to think about. And the author’s idea of restricting care to palliative care at some point in the future has a lot of appeal.
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San Francisco Vacation - a big disappointment
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Posted:Sep 16, 2014 3:10 pm
Last Updated:Oct 8, 2014 11:16 am
10251 Views
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Spent an extended weekend in San Francisco, and I was not impressed.
Sure, there's lots to see and do, but at least when we were there, there are too many people trying to see and do the same things. We spent more time in lines than we did "seeing".
The lines waiting for the cable cars were the worst. We waited four different times, eventually giving up the first three times. On early afternoon on Friday, we waited nearly an hour to be loaded into one of the routes. At first the line advanced, slowly but steadily, but at one point, it just seemed to come to a halt. New cars were being loaded at longer and longer intervals, and it looked like we'd be there at least an hour longer, so we found a bus instead. We tried the middle of the route later that day, and again on Saturday and Sunday, but car after car just passed us by, so we gave up.
Finally, on Sunday night, we noticed the California street route didn't have a line, so we thought we'd try again. We waited about a half an hour for a car, but we did get to experience the cable cars.
On Friday, we tried catching the old streetcars in front of the ferry building to get to Fisherman's wharf. After waiting 30 minutes, we gave up and walked. And after walking about 30 minutes, we saw 5 streetcars go by, all heading the other way.
And there were lines at the restaurants, even with a reservation. And the line at the Science center was so long we didn't even try it. (We found out when we got there, it was a "free day").
And while there wasn't a line, Chinatown was so busy with people, it was hard to enjoy.
So, although we had a good time, enjoyed some excellent food, and finally saw most of what we wanted to see, the long lines really took most of the enjoyment out of it.
Did we just pick the wrong time of the year, or is Frisco always this busy?
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Age and Amorousness
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Posted:Sep 2, 2014 9:42 am
Last Updated:Oct 7, 2014 9:18 am
12263 Views
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I’m surprised by how little that age has affected my amorousness. I bought into society’s general wisdom that the libido dies off as we get older, but, that has not been my experience. Sure, I don’t have the physical performance of my youth, but as the saying goes, I may not be as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was! But when it come to desire, there just hasn’t been that much of a decline.
In all honesty, there probably has been some decline since my years, but that really happened in my twenties and thirties. I used to get an erection at the slightest stimulus, and often at inopportune times - during track meets, in the school hall, in the lunch line, etc.
But, after marriage and starting a career, that tended to decrease. I still got an erection at inconvenient times, but a whole lot less often. And that continued to decline till about age 40. Since then, I seldom get an erection without a pretty obvious stimulus. I don’t know if it was age or just the business of life that caused it, but I don’t miss the embarrassment.
But when it comes to desiring sex, especially sex with a strong emotional connection between me and my partner, I’m as amorous as ever. And that is a very pleasant surprise.
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What was your parents sex life like?
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Posted:Aug 29, 2014 3:06 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2014 9:19 am
10468 Views
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I got to thinking the other day as I realized that I had reached the age my mother was at when we finally had a discussion about sex. Not the birds and the bees lecture, but a discussion about her sex life with my father. Not exactly the kind of discussion most of us probably ever have with a parent, and not one I was really prepared to have with my mom, but it came up, and I while it was not very enjoyable at the time, as time has gone by, I’m glad it did.
The instigation of the discussion was finances. My dad was the manager of a test farm for a pharmaceutical company. He ran the farm where they raised the animals used to test the drugs they developed for agricultural uses. His company had a good retirement program and when Dad retired, against the advice of nearly everyone, dad sunk almost his entire retirement portfolio into one pot … that company's stock. He said people were always going to get sick, and they had been a good company to work for, so it would be a good company to invest in. He turned out to be correct, though I wouldn’t recommend his strategy to anyone.
Within a year of his sinking everything into that company's stock, the company released a drug to combat erectile disfunction, and his investment multiplied almost overnight. A barely comfortable retirement, became very comfortable. He and mom were able to travel around the world, visiting places most of us only dream of before their health gave out.
So our conversation about sex began with a discussion about the ED drug, and what it had meant to them financially. Out of the blue, mom admitted that it had made a big difference in other ways as well. She said dad had occasionally had problems with impotence as he had grown older, and it had taken a toll on their sex life. He became so afraid of not being able to get an erection that he seldom initiated sex anymore. The ED drug gave him back his confidence, and their sex life returned to normal.
Of course, mom had to explain that they had always enjoyed a robust physical relationship. Dad enjoyed her large breasts, and she was convinced that was what had attracted him when they first met. They mated like rabbits, she claimed, going at it whenever they got an opportunity, frequently more than once a day when they were younger, and gradually slowing down to two or three times a week, until he started to have performance issues. Now they were back to twice a week.
My gawd, I thought, my parents were having sex more often than I did, and I thought I was in a healthy relationship. This was hard to believe about a couple that seldom displayed any public affection, and had never talked about sex with me before this. But I had no reason to not believe it.
Mom then explained that they had been forced to change positions to her on top due to her osteoporosis, as she couldn’t handle his weight on top of her. Whoa! TMI!! TMI!! I tried hard not to show my distaste for the conversation, but I doubt if I was totally successful as our conversation moved on to other topics shortly after that revelation.
I’ve often thought about that conversation in the years since then, usually in a “good for them” kind of way. But as I thought about it this week, I got to thinking. Mom talked about switching to woman on top as if they had only ever tried two positions for sex. Could that be right? Then I got to wondering if they had ever tried oral sex? Or even more adventuresome positions or activities? I know times are different now, but according to Kinsey’s original 1950s and 60’s research, not that different. Oral sex was not mentioned in public or polite company, but behind closed doors, it was pretty common. Mom and Dad were pretty hip for their times, so I have trouble believing that they missed out on this pleasure. They are both gone now, as are most of their contemporaries, so I’ll probably never know. I guess it doesn’t matter, but they raised me to be a curious .
How about you? Ever wondered if your folks enjoyed oral sex? Can you picture your dad with his face in your mother’s muff? (That’s not a picture I even want to try to visualize.)
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Breast surgery questions
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Posted:Aug 26, 2014 1:37 pm
Last Updated:Jul 9, 2017 5:55 pm
10690 Views
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I've posted before about my , who was born female, but about three years ago, came to the realization that she would be more comfortable as a he, and has gradually been transitioning to a boy.
He is now 15 years old, and entering his sophomore year in high school.
A current issue is his boobs. He inherited what my mother's family refers to as the "family curse", huge boobs. He started developing early, and while I'm not sure of the exact size, they are very, very prominent and noticeable. He's small, under 5 foot and not quite 100 pounds, and his boobs really do stick out. Not exactly what a young man wants to have.
He has tried all sorts of physical means to hide or minimize them. I didn't even know they made chest binders, but I've now purchased them. But they just don't work for him. It just make him bulge out above the binder.
So he wants breast reduction surgery, or more accurately, breast elimination surgery.
I've been fairly (I think very?) supportive of his transition so far. it hasn't been easy. He is not a very manly man, and in many ways is quite feminine. He hates sports, and doesn't really act boyish. He does like fashion and stuffed animals and painted fingernails. But he's also not very feminine. He hates dolls and most feminine fashion. He clearly doesn't fit in, and will admit that he is not 100% boy, but claims he fits more as a boy than as a girl.
I know that his decision was not made lightly. He has suffered terrible levels of teasing and harassment from at his school (and some teachers). It would clearly have been easier to have stayed a girl, so I do take his decision seriously. I want to support him.
That's been fairly easy as long as we were talking things that were temporary. Boys clothes and chest binders are not permanent. Breast surgery will be.
What if 10 years from now he decides to become a girl again? What if he/she has and she wants to breast feed them? The surgery will almost certainly eliminate the breast feeding option, and the Dr has said that going completely flat will probably require that all sensation in the nipples be eliminated. Those are serious side effects that are permanent.
So... Do I let him have the surgery. His mother says yes. What should I say? What would you say if your was in those shoes?
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