The five simple Rules to be Happy
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Posted:Jan 10, 2006 5:22 pm
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2006 4:13 pm
890 Views
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The five simple Rules to be Happy
This 102 year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with his hair fashionably coifed and face shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready. As he maneuvered his walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of his tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on his window.
"I love it," he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.
"Mr. Jones, you haven't seen the room; just wait."
"That doesn't have anything to do with it," he replied.
"Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the furniture is arranged ... it's how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. "It's a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do. Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I'll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I've stored away. Just for this time in my life. Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you've put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories. Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank. I am still depositing.
Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.
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Joke: Apartment For Rent
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Posted:Jan 10, 2006 6:16 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2006 4:14 pm
917 Views
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Joke: Apartment For Rent
A businessman meets a beautiful girl and agrees to spend the afternoon with her for $500. So they do. Before he leaves, he tells her that he does not have any cash with him, but that he will have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment 'RENT FOR APARTMENT.'
On the way to the office he regrets what he has done, realizing that the whole event was not worth the price. So he has his secretary send a check for $250 and enclosed the following typed note:
Dear Madam,
Enclosed find check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the apartment, I was under the impression that:
1) it had never been occupied;
2) that there was plenty of heat;
3) that is was small enough to make me cozy and at home.
However, I found out that it had been previously occupied, that there wasn't any heat, and that it was entirely too large.
Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for $250 with the following note:
Dear Sir:
First of all, I cannot understand how you expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely. As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on. Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the landlady.
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Joke: Getting Home Early
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Posted:Jan 9, 2006 7:35 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
969 Views
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Joke: Getting Home Early
A married fellow gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What's up?" he asks. "I'm having a heart attack," cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his 4-year-old comes up and says, "Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got no clothes on!" The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the closet floor. "You bastard!!!" says the husband. "My wife's having a heart attack, and all you can do is run around the house naked scaring the ?"
Dirty Joke #4 - Grandma's Idea...
... A boy was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down.
"Grandpa what are you doing?" he exclaimed.
The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him.
"Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.
The old man slowly looked at him and said,
"Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This is your Grandma's idea."
Dirty Joke #29 - Make her SCREAM...
... Three men are discussing their previous night's lovemaking.
The Italian says, "My wife, I rubbed her all over with fine olive oil, then we made wonderful love. She screamed for five minutes."
The Frenchman says, "I smoothed sweet butter on my wife's body, then we made passionate love. She screamed for half an hour."
The Englishman says, "I covered my wife's body with lard. We made love and she screamed for 6 hours."
The others say, "Six hours? How did you make her scream for six hours?"
He shrugs. "I wiped my dick on the drapes."
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Flamboyant Outfit
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Posted:Jan 8, 2006 4:10 pm
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2006 4:14 pm
858 Views
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Flamboyant Outfit
A guy sees his best friend on the street. The friend is wearing a flamboyant outfit. Lime colored trousers,
a puff sleeved, lavender shirt, a puce ascot, etc. So he asks his friend, "what in the world is wrong with
you?"
"Oh, my wife," the friend replies.
"Your wife?" queries the first guy.
"Yea. I saw an ad in the paper for Cox's Men's Store. They were having a great sale on seersucker suits. So I told her, go to Cox's and buy me one of those seersucker suits. So what does she do? She goes to
Sears and buys me co#ksucker suit."
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You Know You're Joke #17
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Posted:Jan 8, 2006 1:09 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
794 Views
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>> You Know You're Joke #17 - Dating a Consultant...
... You Know You're Dating/Married To A Consultant when....
10. Referred to the first month of your relationship as a "diagnostic period".
9. Talks to the waiter about process flow when dinner arrives late.
8. Takes a half-day at the office because, "Sunday is your day."
7. Congratulates your parents for successful value creation.
6. Tries to call room-service from the bedroom.
5. Ends any argument by saying, "let's talk about this off-line."
4. Celebrates anniversary by conducting a performance review.
3. Can't be trusted with the car-too accustomed to beating up rentals.
2. Valentine's Day card has bullet points.
1. Refers to lovemaking as a "win-win".
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Day at the Track
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Posted:Jan 8, 2006 8:11 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
854 Views
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Day at the Track
A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a frying pan.
"What was that for?" he asked. "That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Mary Lou written on it," she replied. "Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Mary Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on," he explained. "Oh honey, I'm sorry," she said. "I should have known there was a good explanation." Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked up and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which knocked him out cold. When he came to, he asked, "What was that for?" "Your called."
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Joke: The Statue
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Posted:Jan 7, 2006 10:54 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
787 Views
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Joke: The Statue
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
"Hurry!" she said. "Stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."
"What's this honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh, its just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too."
No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk. "Here," he said to the 'statue', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smith's for three days and nobody offered me so much as a glass of water.
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Take the words back
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Posted:Jan 7, 2006 12:06 pm
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2006 5:41 pm
906 Views
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Take the words back
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back....or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few women who did...
FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who work at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my Sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY:
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me was screams of laughter.
FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your a particular question too many times? My three-year-old had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so, of course, I checked my seven-month-old , and she was clean. Then, I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No". I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled, "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.
An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
LAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow -- but don't get any....a true story.
We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
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Dorothy and Edna
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Posted:Jan 6, 2006 4:36 pm
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2006 4:15 pm
883 Views
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Dorothy and Edna
Dorothy and Edna two "senior" widows, are talking at the local coffee shop.
Dorothy: "That nice Joe asked me out for a date . . . I know that you went out with him last week, and I wanted to talk with you about him before I give him my answer."
Edna: "Well . . . I'll tell you. He shows up at my apartment punctually at 7 P.M., dressed like such a gentleman in a fine suit, and he brings me such beautiful flowers! Then he takes me downstairs, and what's there but a luxury car . . a limousine, uniformed chauffeur and all.
Then he takes me out for dinner. . a marvelous dinner - lobster, champagne, dessert, and after-dinner drinks. Then we go see a show . . . let me tell you, Dorothy, I enjoyed it so much I could have just died from pleasure! So then we are coming back to my apartment and he turns into an ANIMAL. Completely crazy, he tears off my expensive new dress and has his way with me.... two times!"
Dorothy: "Goodness gracious! . . so you are telling me I shouldn't go
out with him?"
Edna: "No, no, no . I'm just saying, wear an old dress."
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A Farmer
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Posted:Jan 4, 2006 4:24 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
850 Views
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A Farmer
A farmer got pulled over by state trooper Jon for speeding, and the trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speed, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the farmer uncomfortable. Finally, trooper Jon got around to writing out the ticket, and as he was doing that he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head. The farmer said, “Having some problems with circle flies there, are ya?”
Trooper Jon stopped writing the ticket and said, “Well yeah, if that’s what they are–I never heard of circle flies.”
So the farmer said, “Well, circle flies are common on farms. See, they’re called circle flies because they’re almost always found, circling around the back end of a .”
The trooper said, “Oh,” and went back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute he stopped and said, “Hey, wait a minute, are you trying to call me a ’s ass?”
“Oh no, officer. I have too much respect for law enforcement and police officers to even think about calling you a ’s ass.”
Trooper Jon said, “Well, that’s a good thing,” and went back to writing the ticket.
After a long pause, the farmer said, “Hard to fool them flies though.”
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Dirty Jokes 010406
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Posted:Jan 4, 2006 9:50 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2006 4:16 pm
922 Views
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Dirty Jokes
A man tells his wife that he's going out to buy cigarettes. When he gets to the store he finds out it's closed. So the guy ends up going to the bar to use the vending machine. While there, he has a few beers and begins talking to this beautiful girl. He has a few more beer and the next thing he knows he's in this girl's apartment and having quite a pleasurable time. The next thing he know it was 3:00 AM.
"Oh my, god, my wife is going to kill me!" he exclaimed. "Quick give me some talcum powder!"
She gets him some and he rubs it all over his hands. When he got home his wife is up waiting for him and she's furious. "Where the hell have you been!"
He says, "Well to tell you the truth, I went into a bar, had a few drinks, went home with this blonde and I slept with her." "Let me see your hands!" she demands. He shows his wife his powdery hands.
"Damn liar, you were out bowling again!"
A dwarf gets on an elevator and pushes the button to go up, just before the door closes, a hand comes through and opens the door. In steps a very large black man. The dwarf stares and says "You’re the biggest man I have ever seen". The man nods his head, and replies " I’m 6-9, weigh 259 lbs., and I have 16 inches, I'm Turner Brown.” The dwarf faints! After coming too, the dwarf asks the man to repeat himself. So he does, "I said I’m 6 - 9, 259 lbs., with 16 inches, my name is Turner Brown.” The dwarf looked relieved and started laughing. “For a minute there, I thought you said ‘Turn Around’.”
The Seven Most Important Men in a Woman's Life
1. The Doctor - who tells her to "take off all her clothes."
2. The Dentist - who tells her to "open wide."
3. The Milkman - who asks her "do you want it in the front or the back?"
4. The Hairdresser - who asks her "do you want it teased or blown?"
5. The Interior Designer - who assures her "once it's inside, you'll LOVE it!"
6. The Banker - who insists to her "if you take it out too soon, you'll lose interest!"
7. The Primal Hunter - who always goes deep into the bush, always shoots twice, always eats what he shoots, but keeps telling her "Keep quiet and lie still!"
Little Red Riding Hood was on her way to see her grandmother in the forest. Her mother warned her "Don't walk through the forest, take the path, or else the Big Bad Wolf will catch you and suck your tits dry!" Little Red started towards her grandmother's house but decided to take the shortcut through the forest anyway. The turtle stopped Little Red and warned her "Turn back and use the path, because if the Big Bad Wolf finds you, he'll suck your tits dry!" Little Red was almost there, so she kept going through the forest. Sure enough, the Big Bad Wolf jumps out of nowhere and tells her "Take off your shirt Little Red Riding Hood - I'm gonna suck your tits dry!!". "Oh no you don't", yells Little Red, as she pulls up her skirt, "You're gonna eat me just like the story says!"
A hunter kills a deer and brings it home. He decides to clean and serve the venison for supper. He knows his are fussy eaters, and won't eat it if they know what it is - so he does not tell them. His little boy keeps asking him, "What's for supper?" "You'll see", says his dad. They start eating supper and his keeps asking what they're eating. "Ok," says her dad, "here's a hint, its what your mother sometimes calls me." "We're eating asshole!!", she screams.
A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital center.
Man: "What are you doing here today?"
Woman: "Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to give me $5 for it."
Man: "Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate sperm, myself. But they pay me $25."
The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they chatted some more before going their separate ways. A couple months later, the same man and woman meet again in the center.
Man: "Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?"
Woman: [shaking her head with mouth closed] "Unh unh."
poem ould You Be The One For Me?
Could You Be The One For Me?
by LoveBug
Could you be the one for me?
Could you be my find?
Could it be, after all this time,
Fate is going to be kind?
Could you be the one for me,
The one to help me forget
The man that broke my heart, my soul
The man that haunts me yet?
You tell me that I'm beautiful
Something I've never heard
But the one still lives here in my mind
That couldn't spare a kind word
It's going to be hard to forget
And pick up the pieces he left
Could you be the one to teach
How to love again and forget?
Could you be the one to come
And mend my broken heart?
Are you willing to piece together
What another broke apart?
It won't be an easy job, you see
My road has been long and rough
And the heart that was once so soft
Is now shut, locked, and tough
But I can feel my heart open again
It's opening for you
Just come in, and love me back
That's all you have to do
I must ask you one small thing
Before we kiss and part
Please be nice and kind to me
I'm tired of broken hearts
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Dirty Jokes#09090
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Posted:Jan 3, 2006 7:52 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
918 Views
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Dirty Jokes#09090
One day the sheriff sees Billy-Bob walking around
town with nothing on except his gun belt and his
boots. The sheriff says "Billy-Bob, what the hell are
you doing walking around town dressed like that?"
Billy-Bob replies "Well sheriff, it's a long story!"
Sheriff says he isn't in a hurry and that Billy-Bob
should tell the story. Billy-Bob continues "Well
sheriff, me and Mary-Lou was down on the farm and
we started a cuddling. Mary-Lou said we should go
in the barn and we did." "Inside the barn we started
a kissing and a cuddling and things got pretty hot
and heavy, well Mary-Lou said that we should go up
on the hill so we did." "Up on the hill we started a
kissing and a cuddling and the Mary-Lou took off all
her clothes and said that I should do the same. Well,
I took off all my clothes except my gun belt and my
boots. Then Mary-Lou lay on the ground and opened
her legs and said "Okay Billy-Bob, go to town..."
A guy can't obtain an erection so he goes to the
doctor. The doctor tells him the muscles at the base
of his penis are broken down and there's nothing he
can do unless he's willing to try an experimental
surgery. The guy asks what the surgery is. The
doctor tells him they take the muscles from the base
of a baby elephants trunk, insert them in the base
of his penis, and hope for the best. The guy says that
sounds pretty scary but the thought of never
having sex again is even scarier so go ahead. The
doctor goes ahead and performs the surgery and
about 6 weeks later gives him the go ahead to "try
out his new equipment". The guy takes his girlfriend
out to dinner. While at dinner he starts feeling an
incredible pressure in his pants. It gets incredibly
unbearable and he figures no one can see him so he
undoes his pants. No sooner does he do this than his
penis pops out of his pants, rolls across the table,
grabs a dinner roll, and disappears back into his
pants. His girlfriend sits in shock for a few moments,
then gets a sly look on her face. She says "That was
pretty cool! Can you do that again?" With his eyes
watering and a painful expression on his face, he
says "Probably, but I don't know if I can fit another
dinner roll up my ass!"
A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife
one Friday evening that reads...
Dear Wife,
I am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I
will be at the Grand
Hotel with my beautiful and sexy 18 year old
secretary."
When he arrived at the hotel there was a letter
waiting for him that read as follows...
Dear Husband,
I too am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I
will be at the
Breakwater Hotel with my handsome and virile 18
year old boy toy. AND,
you, being an accountant, will appreciate that 18
goes into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18."
Well, one night a boy and his girlfriend are out on a
date and as the boy pull in his girlfriends drive-way
to let her out she tells him to come over the next
night for dinner and meet her parents. The boy
agrees and the girl says to him that after dinner
they will make love. Well the boy agrees and as he is
on his way home, he thinks to himself ,"This will be
my first time sleeping with someone, so before I go
over to her house ill stop by the pharmacy and buy
some condoms". Well that day went by and they
young boy was on his way to the pharmacy , and as
he purchased the condoms the pharmacist gives him
a mean look, the boy thinks nothing of it and goes
on. Well, when the boy is at his girlfriends house, her
mother asks him to say the blessing before dinner,
well the boy is going on and on about stuff during
the prayer and his girlfriend leans to him and says "
I didn't know you were such a religious person" and
the boy says back " I didn't know your dad is a
pharmacist".
___poem:Will She Come?
by }X{Angel}X{
all evening he waited
anxiously eyeing the clock
retracing his steps
over and over
counting the minutes
until her arrival
kneeling before a crackling fire
adding another log
he rose to check again
his preparations for tonight
the thick sheepskin rug
lay lovingly spread before the flames
waiting for her
the book
the one she longed after
in that tiny shop downtown
rested on the warm stone hearth
waiting for her
the wine
that special bottle
from a few years ago
late fall harvest
sat open
and sweet
waiting for her
the glasses
his best crystal
sat sparkling in the firelight
waiting for her
his hand
stopped a moment
over his heart
and lovingly fingered
the prize there
hidden away in his pocket
where it lay
waiting for her
taking the ring
from its secret place
he gazed at it
mesmerized by its shine
by what it stood for
soon he smiled and
softly slipped it back
to its repose
where it lay
waiting for her
seating himself back on the chair
he resumed his vigil
over the fire
over the wine
over the clock
over himself
and he sat
quiet and lost in thought
waiting for her
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Dirty joke# 436Young Female Bakery Clerk
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Posted:Jan 3, 2006 12:58 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
970 Views
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I would like to thank my regular visitors.
and sorry If I don't respond to some of the comments. I hope I made you smile and giggle.
And if your a new visitor stop back again I update almost every day.
Have a great day.
________________________________________________________
Joke: Young Female Bakery Clerk
A bakery owner hires a young female clerk who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties. One day a young man comes into the store, glances at the clerk and glances at the loaves of bread behind the counter. Noticing the length of her skirt (or lack thereof) and the location of the raisin bread - on the very top shelf - he politely says to the young woman, "I'd like some raisin bread, please."
She climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread, providing the young man with an excellent view, just as he surmised she would. When she comes down the ladder, he says he really should get two loaves as he is having company for dinner.
As the clerk retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male customers notices what is going on. Thinking quickly, he orders a loaf of raisin bread so he can continue to enjoy the view. With each trip up the ladder, the young lady seems to catch the eye of another male customer. Pretty soon, each male customer is asking for raisin bread just to watch the young woman climb up and down.
After many trips, she is tired, irritated and thinking she is really going to have to try the raisin bread herself. Once again she is up the ladder retrieving a loaf of raisin bread for another male customer. She stops and fumes, glaring at the men below. She notices an elderly man standing among the crowd of males looking up at her who hasn't placed an order yet.
Thinking to save herself another trip up and down the ladder, she yells at the elderly man, "Is yours raisin, too?" "No," croaked the old man, "but it's a quiverin'..."
SPICING UP SEX LIFE
A frustrated housewife decided her sex life needed spicing up after 20 years of marriage.
After her husband went to work she slipped out and went into a lingerie shop and picked up a pair of crotchless knickers. She went home, tarted herself up and donned the new garment and selected a short skirt to go with it. She greeted her husband when he came home from work and sat across from him after she prepares him a drink.
She slowly spread her legs,and in a husky come f**k me voice says "Honey, would you like some of this?"
The husband looks between his ageing wife's legs and lets out his breath, looking up at his doting wife replies, "HELL, NO! Look what it's done to your underwear."
A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentile, I'm still a virgin." The husband being shocked, replied, "How's this possible? You've been married three times before." The wife responds, "Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was...oh, do I miss him!"
One day Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation, called his vice-president, Dave, into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off." Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three . I don't know whom to fire."
The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in, so Dave said, "Barbara, I've got a problem. You see, I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do?" Barbara replied, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache."
Poem Title: THE NEXT MOMENT
THE NEXT MOMENT
by Anne R. C. Neale
The next moment is now, and gone in a blink of an eye,
Begin to make each moment a happy one,
Begin to think positive and to reach your goals,
The next moment is gone and in the past,
The present moment is now that you know,
The future moment will be here for a brief moment,
What are you going to do to use this present moment no ?
The next moment is now, the past moment is gone already
If you didn't enjoy that moment you need to change you see,,
You make the decisions about your life all the time,,
You make yourself with your thoughts sad, or happy,
©2005 ANne R. C. Neale
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