I miss that look of desire
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Posted:Aug 18, 2014 12:40 am
Last Updated:Aug 20, 2014 1:05 am
1504 Views
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Of all the things I miss about sex, it's that look of desire from a girl who WANTS you inside her that I miss the most.
Sure, I miss getting head... well I never had anybody give me head good enough to get me to cum, but just someone willing to give me head, to please me. That's a good one. I miss that.
Sexy clothes. Wow that was nice when I would go over to a girlfriends house just for sex and cuddling and she would be wearing something hot. Something with a bit more access. A swim suit, a T shirt with panties, or nothing else on. A skirt WITHOUT panties. Stockings, a tight, thin shirt. ANYThing to sex it up a bit. That's a good memory.
A girl grabbing my dick. Wow is that a good turn on. When a girl innitiates sex, it's the best. When she grabs your cock it's the feeling that she's doing what I'm doing when I finger her. I can't keep my dick down when I finger a girl because my brain automatically calculates how that pussy would feel around my dick. So it's like she's masturbating in her head, with my cock. Can't get any better than that.
Different positions. Standing up, in the shower, bent over, on top of me, on the side, all wonderful positions. Probably never going to happen again for me, but I'll keep my head up.
It's pretty sad to think about not having any of these things in my life anymore. I wanted to push the envelope with it all, but instead, the envelope is now more like a napkin. A crumbled up napkin with a fresh cum stain wadded up in trash next to my computer.
It's been years since anything close to that has happened to me, and it will probably never happen again. This realization is hard to deal with.
I would forgo any of that though, for the look of desire. A "Fuck me" look. Some lust in her eyes.
I'm going to end up getting myself hard if I keep thinking of these things.
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Darkness
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Posted:Aug 15, 2014 11:48 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1281 Views
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Not to dim the mood or anything. I like to be positive for the most part. But I just realized something.
Everything is dark. Dimming out of proportion, swimming out of view. I couldn't shake myself awake if I was Bud in The Abys.
Everything is getting scary, I only know that tomorrow brings worse news, because I myself have been bad.
So I block it out a bit more... and it all gets a bit darker.
And time has passed, and it's all multiplied, and I'll die sooner now, and I watched myself cut my own potential across the throat, and I'm not the only one who will suffer for it, and I don't... want... that.
But the slope is so steep and I can't get sleep because I need some pussy or some more booze please.
Some release, some girl saying please, some kneas, some pleads, some opportunities.
Cum with me, put it deep, fill up my pussy.
Don't be shy, be alive, cum deep deep inside.
Oh my.. Fuck.... my puss.. OOH!
MMMMMM... just the fucking THOUGHT of it sends me into a deep coma of lust.
Everything else gets darker.
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A brief history in my sexual past
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Posted:Aug 14, 2014 12:11 am
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1349 Views
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I'm going to be very candid here, so I hope you appreciate it.
One of my rules for myself is to not get exposed here, and if certain people see this, they might put two and two together, but I'm taking that chance because I'm pretty sure I'm at the end of my rope. I want to express myself and maybe here, it'll be a bit more discreet.
I lost my virginity at 19. It was EPIC late for what my friends had been up to. Lots of cock blocking on me lead to less of those friends, but I digress. Out of all of us I SHOULD have been the one getting laid.
The girl I lost my virginity to had no idea what she was getting into. I was the nice guy and she was into bad boys, "tattoos make me wet" "MEOW" at a poster of Skinny Puppy. I was the last thing she wanted to fuck, but she liked me, and she was horny and boom, she made the big mistake of showing me her pussy.
She had this thing where if you fucked her for a couple of hours it would start to hurt her and she LOVED it.
I could tell it hurt, but it wouldn't stop me from fucking her because she would still cum another time. One day she told me it hurt, and I slowed down. It was a few sex sessions later when I realized that when she told me it hurt, it meant fuck harder. When I did, even more stars shone. I don't think since then I've seen a girl cum so hard. I WISH I could feel her pussy again that night.
She dumped me of course. I was WAY too sexually needy... and I was WAY too a nice guy. Maybe I could make her cum, but I couldn't get her TO the bed to do so anymore. I was a wus.
Few years later, I met the monster fuck of my life. A cute, hippie girl who could NOT say no. OH we had a lot of sex, and I still admire her for having an imagination. She could have been WAY more aggressive, but once she initiated a 69, and she would say things like "I was thinking about sucking your dick." Things a man DREAMS to hear. It turned out that I wasn't the only man she couldn't say no to. She basically dumped me and said yes to every guy in the area.
Then a loooooong drought. A few one night stands, a half dozen first and last dates and a serious but no penetration sexual relationship and then boom... I met my wife.
We had some... good sex.
Nowadays, it's okay sex... I put my all into it.
Few and far between... no imagination, just keeping me from killing everything in sight. If I have an idea, it's always a no no no....too taboo. "Fuck me in the kitchen?! Are you crazy?!"
But that's just me bitching. The fact is I am GOOD at sex. I just need to find a way to get her to ... maybe get wet because she saw me in some way. If I got buff I know I could fuck her more... if I got off my ass and did some work... it would take a long time, but she would want me to fuck her.
SHE WOULD WANT ME TO FUCK HER!
That's SUCH a weird thing to think.
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Simultaneous Fuckin'
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Posted:Aug 13, 2014 11:51 pm
Last Updated:Aug 15, 2014 11:54 pm
1310 Views
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I'm the kind of guy who wants a girl all to himself. I could handle another guy in the room... but another guy fucking her at the same time... Nonononono. There are girls who don't want cum on their face.... well I REALLY don't want cum on my face. If it's MINE... okay, maybe but it should be kinky before that. Another guys cum shouldn't ever be near me though.
I'm sure that's immature to some people. I'm a guy, he's a guy, we both cum at times... why not, at the same time in the same place right? No. I wouldn't ask a girl to fuck another girl with me either. PURELY out of the fact that I do NOT want her to ask me to fuck another guy with her. One CLEARLY outweighs the other.
I'm not all about simultaneous fuckin', but I have been fucking myself in different ways simultaneously.
Drinking, WAY too much, made me stupid and useless the next day.If you were an athlete it would take a week to get back in gear and I just drank until there was not even a chance of me getting up, let alone getting out and doing something.
That lead to less sex. Who wants to fuck someone who said they would clean up, but got TOO DRUNK?
Nobody.
Already knowing that sex is my great muse. (Paintings, poetry, work, physical feats, working out ect... all about sex) I drank MORE.
Downward spiral established: More you drink, worse you feel, more you want to drink... plus more you drink, less sex, more you want to drink.
This is a KILLER combination. No, sex isn't the ANSWER, and YES, it is all my fault. One would say "You could quite drinking right now." YES... I could... I tell myself I WILL. Hell I'll tell myself I won't guy an ounce of booze tonight at 9pm... but at 10... I'm holding and just waiting for the opportunity to chuck the bottle sky ways.
I think I'm fucked.
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First World Problems
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Posted:Aug 13, 2014 11:32 pm
Last Updated:Aug 24, 2014 11:23 pm
1395 Views
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Well it's been at least two weeks since I have had sex. That puts me in a great mood...it's usually a lot longer.
My sex drive used to be what pushed me to get more athletic. But I have a confession to make:
I'm an alcoholic.
Not in the sense that I drink once a week. Or twice a week, or three times... I drink EVERY DAY.
I'm sick... every day.
I've been worse, but I was younger, and my body wasn't as used to it... and at the same time was better at coping with it.
This is, in a sense a cry for help. I don't want it to be, but if I can write about it and maybe get advice, or (Pitty?!) whatever, it helped last time a bit.
I've been drunk for about a week now. I've had NO money, so I've been borrowing, just for cheap hard liquor. It's quite pathetic.
Who I used to be, and who I am now are pretty much opposite.
I like to think that I don't know how I got here, but I do.
I always drink.
I don't ever want to post something here that doesn't have to do with sex, so I'm going to let you in on a little secret...
If the bet was No Alcohol = No Sex, sex would win out %90 of the time. That's not life though.
Life apparently isn't about sex. You have a whole ton of things going on not revolving around sex... it's CRAZY, I know... but it's true. You definitely can't base your alcohol life on sex, or vice versa.
So I'm not going to admit that a small part of me, my shadow, wants pitty. I'm just going to say that I'm going through a really rough time right now, and I'm going to write about it here.
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PUSSY.
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Posted:Aug 13, 2014 10:33 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1123 Views
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Yes, I can ward myself off from any Faint of Heart that think a title like "PUSSY" is low rate.
But it's not.
I put it in capitals for a reason.
PUSSY... as much as it has been empowered, it has yet to have any justice done for it.
It's SO beautiful, which makes no sense. Usually beautiful things and things with FOLDED flesh aren't in the same category. Yet, PUSSY (Which almost closely resembles the mouth from the alien in Predator, or the nose of some wild bat..) is the most beautiful thing anybody can ever behold. *Sexually speaking*
I myself have been in situations where I could make out with a girl, but not get it up... until I saw her pussy. Oh my god.
It's unbelievable, how much money, how much emotion, work, physics, art... pussy was great to begin with, but it's done even better in our trying to capture and understand it.
Scientists don't report on pussy, because any way you look at it, it's your future and your past and that doesn't make sense.
Girls love pussy, when they masturbate, they know that someone could see it and get off themselves.
A guy can't just jerk off, film it, and feel happy about himself. (Some can, yes... but you gotta be Clooney hot.for that shit.)
I would say, that it MUST be harder for a guy to suck another guys dick, than it is for a girl to lick another girls clit, across the board, gay bi or whatev.
When I see a pussy.... I can't help myself. I go insane a bit. I'm in love with it. I MAKE love with it. The TASTE of pussy, is like a wave from the afterlife because no matter how many times you smell and taste it, you need to smell and taste it again to make sure it's real. It CAN'T be real.
Watch as much porn as you want, jerk off a million times a day... it won't be nearly as satisfying as PUSSY.
Lube your hand up, microwave a watermelon, nothing is wetter, nothing is better than PUSSY, PUSSY, PUSSY.
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Truthtalk 2. a continuation
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Posted:Jul 29, 2014 1:26 am
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1294 Views
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So why do guys always fall in love with sluts? Get themselves hurt, and hang their heads on girls who aren't so "pretty".
Same reason. The more attractive the person, the more they can get away with. Being inherently equal, a guy, no matter how much of an asshole he may be, can't physically control a woman.
Sluts, (girls who give sex for no promise of intimacy or future exclusivity) are attractive to guys because they want sex and are not afraid to admit it.
Most girls have been taught to NEVER admit that. I don't know if I agree with that or not, because the only girls to admit that to me, did so on such a "No big deal" basis that I thought they didn't REALLY want me. (stupid star. She wouldn't have offered if she didn't WANT your D)
Either way... you got both. GIrls who don't want anything but assholes, and guys who are assholes...
My only problem with that is that it takes away sex from the geeks. I myself would be HONORED to call myself a geek, but I don't know things about batman,superman, starwars, or Menga, so I assume the role of Nice guy with nothing to offer.
STILL feel bad for those geeks.
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Truethtalk 1.
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Posted:Jul 29, 2014 1:09 am
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1289 Views
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I HATE the "word" truthtalk, but it makes sense here, because it's short and to the point.
No BS, no beating around the bush, explain your idea, or pain, or anger, as raw as you can.
I HATE girls who give it up for "Bad Boys".
ON SO MANY LEVELS!!
Recently an attractive girl I know told me that she was not interested in any man unless he had an arrest warrant.
WTF?! THAT'S your prerequisite?!
Why do girls like outlaws and assholes?
Well it's not one or the other, that's for sure.
Go back in time long enough and I'm pretty sure the biggest asshole was the one you WANTED to hook up with because he was the only one who knew what to do. Like a geek/jock.
Since then there's been quite the separation. Smart or Strong. Well it's simple... strong!
Humans have been getting smarter and smarter at such a fast rate that we still have these weird instincts like "Fuck the most viable mate around!!!" and next thing you know, the girl next door is banging the living hell out of an ex con with an IQ of 68 because he has good looks.
Happens all the time... and both ways and it just sucks.
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What did I come here for?
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Posted:Jul 28, 2014 10:58 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1253 Views
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I've been struggling with myself lately.
Coming back to VisionPersonals.com was a hard decision.
I first came here outright, to cheat on my wife. I was quite blatant about it. I did what I could to find help here and went to some discussion forums... which I must admit, the people who were supposed to give support simply called me a pig over and over again, so that was nice but it wasn't like I needed to feel worse about myself at that point.
I would imagine, that someone who had put themselves in a position to conference someone looking HERE to cheat, would list good things about not cheating. Instead I got the feeling that I SHOULD cheat, just to piss those guys off. You MUST be EVIL to THINK such a thing. I don't care WHAT she is like... (gotta go, bikini wax in 20, he loves it when I do that)
I KNOW a LOT of people who have cheated and gotten away with it: They are MARRIED to the person they cheated on, or they are still, over years, going out with a person who has or STILL cheats on them.
LONG story short, cheating is rampant, and it's not slowing down and I'm STILL a saint.
I didn't cheat, but not because of those people.
I didn't cheat because I don't WANT to cheat.
I WANT PUSSY, SEX... and to make a girl CUM.
What did I come back for? I came back to make someone cum.
To connect, in a SERIOUSLY DEEP way.
I don't care if you find me fucking repulsive... I came back to listen, and tell it like it is.
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At Midnight
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Posted:Jul 28, 2014 10:00 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2024 5:29 pm
1219 Views
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At Midnight I can think about her...
Now I can talk about her.
About her hair. Her breasts, her tongue, and her unbelievable ass.
At Midnight I can finally say,
What I want to convey,
To the world about her ways.
At Midnight I can sprawl her legs apart, and see heaven again.
Nah, Heavens pearly gates... got NOTHIN on this beauty.
THIS is from EARTH. THIS is MORE precious than heaven... it will never be here again... it is SO unique, SO beautiful, SO erotic....Heaven has nothing.
Midnight, is more than a time, but a tool.
Midnight, is more than a tool, but release,
Midnight is me. Midnight is free.
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