|
|
|
|
|
Are you ready to quit?
Are you ready to learn?
Are you ready to find the spark inside and let it burn?
I'm the walls that close in
I'm the words you won't say
I'm the voices you choose to keep inside
And lock away
Everyday
****
I don't want to be flawless. When I go I want the cuts to show.
****
Passion. It lies in all of us, sleeping, waiting.
And though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir.
Open its jaws and howl.
It speaks to us, guides us, passion rules us all.
And we obey, what other choice do we have?
Passion is the source of our finest moments.
The joy of love, the clarity of hatred,
and the ecstacy of grief.
It hurts sometimes more than we can bear.
If we could live without passion,
maybe we'd know some kind of peace.
But we would be hollow.
Empty rooms, shuttered, dank.
Without passion, we'd be truly dead.
****
'Cause sometimes you just feel tired, you feel weak
And when you feel weak you feel like you want to just give up
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength
And just pull that shit out of you and get that motivation to not give up
And not be a quitter, no matter how bad you want to just fall flat on your face and collapse
****
Music is like a tattoo,
and bands have to make music
where people are proud to wear your tattoo,
no matter what kind of music you like.
****
For some, music is not just a pastime,
It’s an undeniable fact of living,
A blissful slavery of mind, body and soul.
To rise above the ashes of mediocrity is rare,
Yet the gift of song is freely handed out to anyone who cares to receive it,
Instantly shattering our daily drudgery. The path to pursue more than the usual,
More than what is safe and known,
Is wrought with time-sharpened jagged blade s that cut deep,
Blocking many from the road to something greater,
Beyond the stunted imagination of their peers. Within the veins of the few,
Passion fills every sinew with a sweet unquenchable purpose,
Calming the fear of those treacherous paths,
Though every slice burns and bleeds,
Still they take each cut
And wear the scars with pride to signal their choice,
That undying pursuit of greater joy within every cord.
And so they say – Watch me bleed
****
When life knocks you down..calmly get back up, smile, and very politely, say, "You hit like a bitch."
****
I’ll never show you my cards, I won’t be playing a hand worth bluffing. But when you’re running with me, you won’t be wondering why you’ve fallen.
****
|
|
My Stephen Kellogg/Hanson/Sex vacation in Oct
|
Posted:Dec 31, 2015 5:35 pm
Last Updated:Nov 23, 2017 7:32 pm
7357 Views
|
Back in October I went to Cleveland to see Hanson. I'll back up first and the Friday before after work I met 2 friends at a local place where a singer we like came to town to play. He's pretty cool, Stephen Kellogg.
This is the second time he's been here. I actually saw him when he opened for Hanson. He's one of the few opening acts I still follow. We've seen him enough (my friend moreso than me) that he recognizes us.
The venue was really dark and horrible for pics though.
So then I had a friend from WV actually come up the Sunday on the 11th with his little boy, took them to the Inclined Plane, we went out for dinner, then the next day he drove me to Pittsburgh where we were gonna have lunch at the Hard Rock before I had to meet up with my friend I was going to Cleveland with. But it was like a half hr wait time and we couldn't be late meeting my friend so we went to this seafood place, pretty good food.
The ride up was really cramped. She has an SUV but with all our luggage and there were 6 of us, it was a horrible fit. 2 hour ride.
She had taken her 2 daughters and her husband,then me and 1 of her friends. Her 2 daughters and husband were staying at a hotel while we camped out for the first show (it was a 2 night event). So when we dropped them at the hotel I met up with a guy that I had been talking to for quite awhile on here since he was nearby. We grabbed dinner and then went back to hang at his place. I was open to something happening but wasn't really expecting it since we didn't seem to connect much. Our few phones convos he made me laugh but we barely ever texted.
I'm not really much for detail tonight but we ended up naked and first time with a new guy is always awkward for me but it was good.
So then he dropped me off at the venue to meet up with my friends. It was friggin cold and I slept maybe 2 hrs all night. I should've ended up 2nd row but I'll get to that later. It was fun camping out besides the cold. Always make friends with other fans, we laugh, joke, it's a kinship. I haven't camped out in quite awhile actually. I used to a lot.
There was a Starbucks open at 6 am so me and 2 others went to pee and grab some drinks. We sat in the warmth for awhile, talked, reminsced about past shows.
The day passed in a blur. So we go in when doors open and long story short I got an asshole security guard who made me take almost everything out of my purse, made me end up 4th row instead of 2nd. I was soooo pissed. I wanted to punch him. I've had a bad experience at this venue before and this was its 2nd shot. I was so never coming back after this trip.
The show was awesome as always. Paul McDonald was the opening act, he was pretty good. I met him after, he was really nice.
The first night was a covers setlist mainly.
Twist and Shout
Shake a Tail Feather
I Want To Take You Higher
Hold On Im Coming
I’ve Got Soul
You May Be Right
Movin Out
Voice in the Chorus
God Only Knows
Stand by Me
This Time Around
Me and Julio / Cecelia
Penny and Me
Georgia
Dancing in the Street
Signed Sealed Delivered Im Yours
Chain of Fools
Never Been To Spain
Desire
Kate
Lost Without Each Other
You Cant Stop Us
High Voltage (ACDC)
I Believe In A Thing Called Love
I was videoing so much my arm was tired, but so worth it.
There was an afterparty where Tay was djing after and they were serving mmmhops Hanson's beer. I actually got the last 1 the venue had. No joke. She literally said this is the last 1 we have.
If I wouldn't have been alone maybe I would've had more fun. I sat and watch hanson on stage hyping the crowd while Tay djed.
Would've been an awesome night club, hanson music, Tay djing, if there would've been single guys. But most of the guys there were there with their girls.
So I had the guy pick me up after and I was staying at his place instead of camping out with my friends again. I didn't wanna be cold again. We had some more fun.  I was warm, on a couch not the ground.
The next day I had a tiny wish that I would've camped so I would've been closer but I was ok. My camera is awesome and even in the back I got awesome pics and vids. Plus I was enjoying some drinks, got tipsy, which I never drink at Hanson shows.
Hanson did their charity walk and someone got proposed to. Man lucky girl.
Also during the day a girl I had seen at many shows and I walked over to a local mall to get warm and grab some lunch. It was weird how we saw each other a lot and yet was the first time we actually sat down and really got to know each other. Timing.
Also the 2nd night the security guard was different and didnt do the same thing. Plus I had realized after the big stink of making me pretty much empty my bag and I had a little bag of female things inside my purse and that 1st night he made a big deal of that. Plus he was asking why I had a book and charger, etc. Because I was going straight to my friend's house not to the hotel. He had no right asking all that. Then he never passed the wand over me over checked my pockets.
So the 2nd night when I saw the proper way they do it I asked to speak to the security manager. When he came down after the Opening act Carrick (from a band Everybody Else that had opened for Hanson back in 200 , I was calm and explained I felt like he singled me out. Especially when earlier in the day other fans were saying that same guy hadn't done to them what he did to me. I explained in detail what he did and his comments and how I felt he acted unprofessionally. The security manager was very apologetic and said he wished I'd have told him the night before cause he could've got me my spot back. But I never know with venues if they'll be dicks and help or if I'd have taken that chance and then lost even 4th row.
He did get me a free drink and said he'd look at the camera. He had me describe the guy and which line I went through (there were 3). That he'd reprimand the guy. I think he did too cause after the show when I was waiting to get a pic with Carrick before I headed to the tour bus outside that security guard from the 1st night gave me a dirty look.
- Austin, another member of Everybody Else, he was helping Carrick
I perhaps will give that place another shot. I'm glad I talked to the security manager. I think the manager saw I wasn't nuts and just explained myself calmly. I said I understand security, I've been to many venues for many concerts all over the east coast and this has been almost the worst experience. I even said had 2 yrs prior I had a bad security experience then too and this was a 2nd chance only cause Hanson wasn't coming closer to me and it was a special tour. But that I felt that guy really just didn't follow proper procedures. He said it's not the first time he's had that happen with a staff member. Also now I know if this happens again to ask for the security manager on the spot. But also I don't think I'm gonna camp out at the place anymore, never seems to work for me.
setlist for 2nd night
Already Home
Tearing It Down
Look At You
Minute Without You
Thinking Of You
Juliet
Broken Angel
Thinking Out Loud
Been There Before
Waiting For This
Remember The Time
I Want You Back
Wheres The Love
Love Me (Taylor solo)
Hand In Hand (Isaac solo into full band)
Thinking Bout Somethin
MMMBop
Get The Girl Back
Man From Milwaukee
Watch Over Me
Fired Up
In The City
Roller Coaster Love / Whole Lotta Love
again, I was videoing so much. Normally I only take maybe 3 vids a show but they were playing so many rare songs I was in heaven. You can check them out same name on the tube.
After the 2nd show I went to find the tour bus, walked past the alley cause it's hidden, had to backtrack. Found it. hanson was taking pics but I couldn't get close enough so I talked to his guy hanson fan for like an hour and a half. No one who isn't a fan just doesn't understand that kinship we share. How we go on about our love and the little things we can mention and each other will get. Total strangers with someone epic in common.
Afterwards the guy came and picked me up, I stayed with him again. One reason I wasn't staying in my friend's hotel is cause I'd have been sleeping on the floor cause there were too many of us and not enough beds. Couch is better and less crowded, just him and I. More naked fun that night. My friend actually ended up dropping my stuff at his house that was still in her SUV cause I stayed an extra day and he took me home a day later. I gave him gas$.
Since then we've talked more and well I'll tell more later, but I'm gonna stop this here. It was a great trip overall except for jerkoff security guard on night 1. Just what my heart and soul needed.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
|
|
Condom, masterbate, true love, balls, 3some, auditions, boy vs man, batteries, call
|
Posted:Dec 30, 2015 6:15 pm
Last Updated:Aug 20, 2017 9:11 pm
6189 Views
|
9 pics
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
|
|
Hypocrisy and Immaturity
|
Posted:Dec 20, 2015 10:19 am
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2015 10:21 am
6590 Views
|
"just because i dont respond to your text dont go calling my pics fake there is a reason i didnt respond clearly u not my type lmao grow up"
I found this on the "local" feeds. Copied exactly as it was typed. I won't say who. I was going to reply directly but I don't want any of the guy's viewers thinking it's me he's referring to and he seems like he has his head up his ass so he's not going to take advice anyway. So hello blogs! 
His status is so full of hypocrisy. He needs to grow up. Maybe the chick needs to grow up too and stop texting, I don't know that end. But how low is it to not just say"Hey I don't want to talk anymore, please leave me alone." Then if she keeps texting then she's the one in the wrong. Cause obviously he hasn't done that since he said " There's a reason I didn't respond" I had to use correct grammar, sorry. 
I'm not saying in the past I'm not guilty of it, but I try not to do it anymore and at least say not interested.
But yeah, that one just stopped me and made me shake my head how immature he was.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Whatever—I’ll just Date Myself
|
Posted:Dec 20, 2015 10:08 am
Last Updated:May 22, 2024 9:38 am
6597 Views
|
“I’m not single. I’m not taken. I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves my heart.” ~ Unknown
I’m not bitter or spiteful but seriously—I’m just going to start dating myself.
It’s not that I can’t find a date, but I don’t want to date just anyone.
The biggest problem is that I am happy just doing my own thing.
As true as this is though, I would welcome a man coming in and turning my world upside down and telling me once and for all how it was going to be played.
But no one is doing that right now, so rather than just wait around for a date, I’m going to live it up instead.
I am done with accepting less than what I want and deserve—and fortunately my bullsh*t radar is sensitive and I can spot the players and narcissists a mile away.
I can tell the difference in a man’s gaze and whether he is just after the curves of my body, or if it’s the bends in the road of my mind that he desires to traverse the most.
I know whether I am valued or just desired—and while I don’t want perfection or riches—I do need a man to be on his own game before he steps to me.
Because the thing is, I know that I am kind of a catch—and while the superficial doesn’t impress me—confidence and authenticity do.
That is why I have decided to just date myself.
I enjoy long evenings by myself, roaming through the market, stopping and smelling ripe fruits and planning meals that excite and delight my senses.
I love turning up the music in my house as loud as I want, and with an intoxicating sway in my hips I lick the delicious spices from my fingers while I cook—smiling simply because I am happy.
I don’t need someone to take me out and spend money on me to make me feel loved and until a man comes along who will be content watching me dance barefoot in the kitchen while I cook for us, I’m happy living a life I love.
I don’t need a man to take me out to a movie just so I am not alone.
The truth of it is—I rather like my own living room and my own company.
Because I’ve realized there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely.
I am alone.
I am single, and while I want a man in my life and know that in many ways I need one as well—I’m not lonely.
I have an amazing career, friends that never cease to amaze me with their love and support and a family who always has my back—but most importantly, I love myself too.
I’m not self-centered or self-absorbed saying this, but healthy.
Because if we haven’t fallen in love with ourselves—then how can we ever expect anyone else to?
I love my own company just fine—but more than that, I know myself.
In all of my quiet nights I have discovered who I am and how I like it.
I know all the ways that I like to spend my time and what type of foods are my favorites.
I know what I believe in and I know what kind of love I am hoping for.
And most importantly, I know what kind of woman I am.
So, while I am single for now, I’m good with it.
Because I know now that I don’t want just any man.
I want a warrior, a golden hearted king among men, who will be regarded because of his intentions and loyalty, his morals and his courage.
A man whose heart will be his greatest feature.
This man will stand in awe of me, yet have no problem telling me when I am wrong.
Because I know that I need an equal and until I get that I’m good being by myself.
I’m good with taking myself out on dates and getting away for romantic weekends where I can enjoy my own company and dream about the man who I will share all of my memories with someday.
There isn’t loneliness in dating myself—there’s peace because I am content in enjoying and living my life until someone comes along who wants to stake a claim in it for good.
Someone who will be proud to claim me as his woman—a man who will see that my heart is my greatest feature too.
And while my long hair may be soft against his bare chest, and my eyes may burn into his, it won’t be my physical features that he falls in love with.
Because the man who decides to finally step to me will have fallen in love with my mind—even the darkest corners that I used to be scared to show.
He’s going to be smitten by my eccentricities and my soul will take his breath away.
The man who will someday decide that even though he can’t exactly picture what his life will be like with me, he won’t be able to picture his life without me.
A man who will see that the only thing I can guarantee him is a love with a depth that he has never known.
And I won’t be perfect or well behaved all of the time and it’s a guarantee that I will make mistakes.
But, I will offer him a complete woman to compliment his life—because now is when I am doing the work.
I have spent time alone, dating myself and all of my amazingness.
So, that one day—when a man finally steps to me with stars in his eyes and blatant intentions in his hands, my only choice will be to grasp a hold of him and hold on tight.
But, until that happens—I have made the choice to stay true to my heart.
And just date myself.
By: Kate Rose
*not me*
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
What I Learned from Abstaining from Dating & Sex for One Year
|
Posted:Dec 20, 2015 10:02 am
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2015 10:21 am
6329 Views
|
Last year, the true voice within me rose: I’d had enough of dishonoring myself. I made a decision to abstain from dating and sex for one year.
This was the promise I made to myself and kept, and it was the most transformational gift I have ever given myself.
The love I had been seeking in others my whole life I gave to myself throughout this year.
Keeping this sacred promise sent a message to every part of my being, telling me I am powerful and that my life matters. It was a promise of light. The promise gave me the freedom, the permission, love and space to see my true self, my humanity and my divinity, and it allowed me to heal on so many levels.
When I made this promise, I entered into a relationship with myself and learned to be my own best friend; I found the strength in myself that I had always sought in men.
In growing into a relationship with myself I learned that the foundations of any relationship are love, trust, honor, truth, faith and free will. This relationship and time with myself gave me the chance to connect on a deeper level with my true voice, my true power and my self.
The connection I created with myself gave me the space to listen to my heart—to hear her wisdom.
Through this deepening connection came the power to forgive others and to let go of old beliefs, patterns, constructs, identities and wounds.
For the first time in my life I gave myself the chance to discover and be me—to live as I am, to listen and live from my heart and to love myself as I am.
This heart-opening year allowed me to see and feel the truly beautiful, passionate, blazing love that burns inside me. I learned that that is my true power and that is the place where my true voice emanates from. That is the voice I started using this year.
Every challenge I faced along this journey served to help my growth. In December I finally understood how dangerous the belief that, “I am powerless without a man” was to my entire life. I finally understood how precious my life is and for the first time I became fiercely protective of my life and of my sacred journey.
The most important thing this year taught me was how to love myself truly and from there everything else flowed. The love I gave myself this year taught me I am a powerful woman and not a victim.
This journey took hard work and perseverance but I was never alone, I had so much help from Great Spirit, from dear friends and loved ones. Everything that I learned, realized, overcame and experienced by keeping this promise to myself made it truly the best year of my life.
I hope my story can benefit others, as well. I learned that I had to heal and become whole myself before I could enter a healthy relationship with another. If you find yourself caught in a cycle of unfulfilling and destructive relationships, a similar course of action may be of benefit to you too.
By: Lindsey McPhee
*not me*
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Christmas recipes pics - easy
|
Posted:Dec 19, 2015 3:23 pm
Last Updated:Dec 28, 2016 6:15 pm
6389 Views
|
Just some pics I found on FB for anyone interested. We tried the cool whip one with red velvet cake mix and omg sooo good!
|
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
Tongue
|
Posted:Dec 19, 2015 3:06 pm
Last Updated:Jan 16, 2016 2:26 pm
6519 Views
|
I think once I had a guy that got a reaction out of me with his tongue. Used to think it was just guys who had no skill and I'm sure that was the case for some but I think I just don't get much from that to begin with. Penetration is my thing.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
|
|
Skin Deep
|
Posted:Dec 17, 2015 3:34 pm
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2015 10:00 am
7482 Views
|
Gone are the days of my box gap, flat tummy and toned tush. Gone are the nights I would binge eat anything I could get my hands on to fill my unsatisfying, superficial aspirations. Hunched over trying to make myself vomit up an entire McCain’s pizza, I would let the shower drown out the gagging and the water wash away tears of self-hate.
I had one of those bodies that girls starved themselves for and I couldn’t even see it. I thought of myself as a “bigger” girl at 48 kilos and made jokes about being fat and lazy after skipping dinner and running 10 kilometres.
Then when I went overseas, something clicked. I started to notice that people I met outside the Gold Coast, Australia, didn’t think it was cool that my collarbones protruded from my chest; they thought it was cool that I was travelling the world by myself at 18 years old.
It is all simply perspective. I learned that beauty in other cultures differs significantly to our western views. In Tonga, the more of the woman the better; in Tahiti, body hair and natural, puffy nipples are desired; women from a tribe in Ethiopia have their bodies scarred from birth to be more attractive to their future husbands. In France, underarm hair is considered sexy, and in Northern Thailand, long necks are admired.
Instead of counting calories, I’ve started to count experiences, places I’ve visited and inspiring people I’ve met. I’ve grown into a womanly figure and have fallen in love with my curvy hips that will one day bear , my voluptuous bosoms that hold those in need and my belly that wobbles when I laugh from deep within. I have a newfound adoration for my soft, inner thighs that hug one another when I walk and cushion the hips of a lover.
Fuck perfection. Fuck whatever society’s image of “beauty” is and embrace what you have got. Be grateful for your health, not your bikini bridge. Find people who love you for all your wiggly, out-of-proportion bits. Wear your heart on your sleeve and your differences with pride.
Indulge in delicious, nutritious foods you crave. Taste and share and drink and laugh. Exercise to make your soul feel good, to release endorphins and increase your libido, not to take a popular half-nude Instagram photo. Run outside, hike a mountain, practise yoga in a candlelit room, swim in an ocean. Stand naked in front of a mirror and feel sexy, feel free and authentic. Change your screen saver to a picture that makes you happy to be you – not a picture of someone you want to be.
Focus on your passions and stop spending all your time and energy focusing on image. Start working on what’s within, as that will radiate out. Surround yourself with people who lift you up, who inspire you as a person and make your heart feel full. And find lovers that want to kiss every part of your body, stretch marks, puffy nipples and all.
by Grace Burns
*not me*
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
If you could be turned by 1 of these vampires...
|
Posted:Dec 13, 2015 3:34 pm
Last Updated:Dec 16, 2015 4:06 pm
6919 Views
|
Well here's my dilemma -Spike was my first love vampire. But I don't want to have my face all scrunchy like the vamps in Buffy are. So that would deal my second choice out - Angel, since he comes from the same show.
Third choice is Eric, and I would so pick him but he's kind of selfish. In the books (spoiler alert!!!!!) he leaves Sookie to better his vamp connections (there's more to it but he doesn't love the vamp).
So not sure I'd wanna deal with that, which leaves me with my 4th choice- Damon. They have a bit of a face change but not all scrunched up and Damon is very sweet when he cares for someone so I'd conclude I'd have to pick him.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Departed Pet's message
|
Posted:Dec 13, 2015 3:25 pm
Last Updated:Aug 20, 2017 9:07 pm
6737 Views
|
To my dearest friend.
I stood by your bed last night; I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying you found it hard to sleep.
I spoke to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times, your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today; your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today; you tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you; I smiled and said, "it's me."
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.
It's possible for me, to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."
You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew...
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
and say "good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out...then come home to me.
found on FB
Penny <3
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (itzchic824) use [blog itzchic824] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
181
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
