Admitting an obsession can be healthy
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Posted:Jul 8, 2010 7:27 am
Last Updated:Aug 3, 2010 6:52 am
7017 Views
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I had an interesting chat with a man yesterday and he was quite detailed in explaining his fetish to me. I will not say who he is or what it is, but I found the chat stimulating. We all have a fetish or two and like phobias they are for the most part unexplainable. We don’t choose which kink pushes our buttons, so why should we ever feel ashamed of them. I told him that admitting them, talking freely about them, and indulging in them is rather healthy. He then asked me if I had a fetish and for some reason, I told him. This was a big step for me. I knew I had this all my life but never told anyone, not even my ex husband, though we did things to satisfy the urges of my fixation, it was never brought out into the open. Telling it to a virtual stranger was liberating and I finally heeded my own advice about acceptance. Before anyone gets too crazy thinking it’s really weird, let me put an end to the numerous possibilities running through your heads, BOTH of them, LOL.
I like being watched. Doing anything sexual or not. Whether I’m taking a shower, dressing, putting on my makeup, or even masturbating, I get super turned on that someone is spying on me. It can’t be like I’m on a stage; I want my voyeur to surreptitiously watch me. Of course I will know he is there, but if he is out in the open, I can get somewhat self conscious. I enjoy the sensation of vulnerability.
When I was younger, one of my brothers would spy on me. He never knew it, but I was aware what he was doing. It didn’t bother me; in fact, I would get a rush from it. While he never did anything to me, I knew that this was our secret. I would put on a show for him and often times I could hear him but pretended as if I was unaware. It ended when I went away to college but the feelings I had those nights still send tingles up my spine.
I wonder what would have happened if I let on that I knew he was watching. Probably nothing, and to be truthful, I’m not sure what I would have done if he did attempt to do anything. Now, as a adult, I realize how weird that all sounds and probably is. I won’t talk to him about it, though I’m sure he knows I knew all along. It’s our little secret, but the foundation upon which a full blown fetish has been built.
When first married, my husband would watch me get dressed all the time. Said it turned him on to see a woman do everyday things. Brushing my hair was a major thrill for him. Forget about applying moisturizers, which alone almost caused him to ejaculate.
Anyway, thanks for reading and allowing me to embrace my particular fascination.
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How not to offend someone
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Posted:Jun 9, 2010 2:30 pm
Last Updated:Jul 13, 2010 3:33 am
6650 Views
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Maybe because I wasn't brought up using a computer but I find chatting with more than one person at a time difficult, not to mention rude. I know when I am chatting with a guy and he responds to what I say with something from so far out in left field, the only answer can be that he has multiple chats going on and responded to Chat A's question to Chat B. That's ok, I get it, but to me, if I were to do that to someone, I'd feel bad. If you're at a party and you're talking to one person and another comes over, he or she will generally join the conversation, not start a separate one that has little to do with the original. Anyway, when I do answer and IM, and yes guys, I do respond, I minimize the IM window so as not to get distracted. I'm trying to be polite and give my undivided attention to those with whom I choose to chat. So please, don't take it personally, I am not ignoring you. Well, I guess I am in reality, but am doing so because I am occupied with another person. No need to get angry and call me names or curse me out. I'm not going anywhere soon. Think of it like your trying to call in to buy tickets to a concert. (Wow, how old does that make me sound what with telecharge on line, lol), but you get the idea.
Any suggestions to help me navigate this issue? Don't say chat rooms, you need Attention deficit disorder to keep up with all the stuff going on in there.
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thanks and a moment to explain
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Posted:Jun 4, 2010 8:59 am
Last Updated:Jun 8, 2010 4:37 am
5996 Views
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First, thanks for those that read and took the time to comment on my first post. Some took it in the manner it was written, as a an attempt at getting some laughs. yes, I am somewhat bitter about my divorce, who isn't? to clarify, i am not a man-hater, male basher, or anything of the sort. I have a wonderful father, great brothers, including my twin, and a the greatest young man in the world, my , that are all a part of my life. I work with men all day at the hospital. Please, don't categorize me as someone that really feels that way. I have a strange sense of humor that I think some get, many don't, and that's ok. I just hate giving the wrong impression.
On a lighter note, how about that picture i have on the blog, taken on my 18th birthday. What's with the big Jersey hair??????
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first month
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Posted:May 25, 2010 8:19 am
Last Updated:Jul 9, 2010 3:27 am
7304 Views
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Well, let's just say I had no idea what I was getting myself into when I decided to join this. I guess I expected a reasonable amount of strangeness but that has been surpassed by a wide margin. I'm not a prude but I also realize that this is not the site I was looking for when i signed up. I thought it was a site where Adults could meet friends with the idea of a casual sexual relationship more than plausible. Its a bit more than that, at least from my experience here. How shall I say this, raw meat in the ocean seems to be the best way to describe it. Now with the men to women ratio firmly in the female's favor, I guess I can understand the pit bull mentality when a new woman signs up and dares enter a chat room or answer an IM request. Having said all that, none of which I think is a surprise to any reasonable person, I do think that I have come up with a translation guide to help men and women communicate more effectively making it a more pleasurable time for all.
1-When he says "How you doing" what he means is "wanna fuck"
2-When "he says how is your day going" what he means is "have you gotten fucked"
3-When he says "I like your picture" what he means is "any without your clothes on"?
4-When he asks "what do you do for fun" what he means is "do you like anal sex"?
5-If he asks "do you like anal sex" what he means is, hmmmm, not sure I want to delves into what that could possibly mean
6-when he asks "can you send a pic" what he means is "I don't want to pay for this site and need some masturbation pictures"
7-when he asks "Do you like younger guys", what he means is "I have a mommy thing i need to work out"
8-when he asks "want to see me", what he means is "watch me jerk off on camera"
9-when he says he "wants to cum for you" what he means is you're the one he will be thinking of when he does
10-when he asks if you �like a big dick" what he means that in some cultures, 4 inches is big
11-When he says �let�s talk about you� what he means is �How do you like my cock�?
12-When he says �I�m sure you get tons of emails and IMs� what he means is �Why the fuck haven�t you responded to mine�?
13-When he says �I admire you� what he means is �Nice tits, can I see �em�
14-When he says �I�d like to get to know you� what he means is �just long enough to know how I like his favorite position�
15-when he says �no games, no bull shit�, what he means is �No games, no bull shit FROM YOU�.
16-If he asks if you have what he wants to know the odds of a mother- threesome. (Like that EVER happens)
17-If he asks if you into role playing, what he means is that he has some sick twisted stuff that no one, even prostitutes won�t indulge but what the heck, let me try you
18-If he says �we�re neighbors� what he means is �I will be on the lookout for you�.
19-when he says �I�m not your average guy�, what he means is �I�m BELOW average�
20-If he says �Are you there�, what he means �Fucking Bitch, answer my goddamn page�
21-When he says �very sexy� he means �yeah, I can jerk off to that�
22-If he asks �Have you ever modeled�? What he wants to know is �Would you want to make an internet porno with me�?
23-If he asks �Are you into bondage� what he means is if he ever gets you alone, you�ll look like the Gimp in Pulp Fiction. (Don�t know the reference, rent the movie)
24-When he says �You are mesmerizing� what he means is �I�m jerking off so hard, there is no blood left in my head�
25-when he says �hot and more hot� what he means is�..you know, I have no idea. Perhaps he has low blood sugar
All of the lines are used were from IM pages to me in the 20 minutes it took me to write this, so if any of you gentleman recognize your line, please don't be offended. I am just having fun with you and I like to needle others in a good natured way. Not mean spirited in any way, shape or form.
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To link to this blog (flysolo66) use [blog flysolo66] in your messages.
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