A Turkey Post: the Sequel
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Posted:Nov 23, 2006 8:00 pm
Last Updated:Dec 4, 2006 6:20 am
4178 Views
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I been sick as a this past week and a bit busy the weekd before. I've never understood why they used that expression. Have you ever seen a whine and complain as much as people do when they get sick? When it gets that bad it usually means a trip to the needle jockeys. Rambling aside, I am so frickin tired; I'm gonna get some Zs
by the way..............--
"Happy Turkey Day" to all. Actually, anyone who reads this will see it after the day so, "Happy Weekend of Turkey Sammiches" to one and all.
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45 Days, Give or Take
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Posted:Nov 9, 2006 7:36 am
Last Updated:Nov 25, 2006 4:53 pm
4142 Views
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Yesiree, afer the turkey/ tofurkey slaughter which is right around the corner for the Americans, we come to the 2nd best part of the year. The 1st best being my ultra-secretive b-day (stop reading my profile  I said secret) Its "Poison a Santa" day we all get to leave out rancid milk and dry, sugary cookies for the jolly perv.
I know I'm jumping the gun a bit but I'm getting all goosebumpy. I'll catch him this year for sure. This guy has the ONLY sac I want fom another dude. Once I get the power of the sac, X-Mas will be jacked up forever. No more presents arriving when ur fingers are too blistering cold to open any wrapping. Good no longer have to fall asleep waiting for their gifts at some un Godly hour in the morning; they will come at a reasonable hour. Bad will NOT be rewarded which seems to be the growing trend in most societies. Christmas bonuses will fall in play for paying rent on time and still saving up for all the best sales  Jesus won't have to share his birthday with capitalist greed .
My will be done. 
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Retarded Words for Dummies
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Posted:Nov 2, 2006 11:18 am
Last Updated:Nov 2, 2006 11:19 am
4110 Views
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Exanimate... a fancy way of saying lazy or still
I could write anything from myriad of brief delectables containing... fuck it; stick with the theme  have a good one
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Trick or Treat, Father Fuckers!!!
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Posted:Oct 31, 2006 12:13 pm
Last Updated:Nov 2, 2006 10:52 am
4158 Views
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Dress it up, paint it up, take it out and show it off. After you finish gettin freaky, get ready for Halloween
Does oral taste better when there is a bag of candy in your bloodstream? Eat up and just knock on the window. No need to call first
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Seeking Handywoman with Experience...Inquire within
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Posted:Oct 26, 2006 5:19 am
Last Updated:Nov 9, 2006 7:37 am
4098 Views
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Its one of those days when you you picture that someone waiting for you and it stretches your day. The anticipation of what will be makes it all the more enticing.
I called your cell to ask you for an oral preview of what is in store for me when I get to you. Can you make me ditch work early? 
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I Swear my Birthday Wasn't Yesterday...
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Posted:Oct 22, 2006 2:46 pm
Last Updated:Nov 3, 2006 4:35 pm
4117 Views
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The new man cometh in the form of a friend; the friend who who keeps you up until some hour in the morning is also the friend who is the brand new confidant.
Along with all the other crap I see that I sooooo want (Bluetooth headphones, movies, drug money, etc...) now I have to endure the lies and self- denial unitl he fucks you and you admit he is more than a friend OR until he fucks/tries to fuck you and it all goes screwy enough that I start hearing a lot more from you afterwards.
I want to be that guy- and have even unintentionally been that guy. It is always something, huh? I'll get over it in a day or so but the urge to hit something with a stick is overwhelming
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Have a Freaky Time
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Posted:Oct 13, 2006 6:38 pm
Last Updated:Oct 20, 2006 7:45 am
4445 Views
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I wanted to make this post before the day ran out. I love the 13th of Friday. Horrors, bad luck, re-elections; it kicks so much ass
I think the only bad thing that happened so far was the onset of the rain making me horny as fucks but I got over that. How was your day of freaky fun so close to Halloween?
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Qapla!!!!
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Posted:Oct 12, 2006 6:31 am
Last Updated:Oct 15, 2006 1:20 pm
4349 Views
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They can take our land but they can't take... no, maybe they can take that too but they can't ta... no they can get that too.
Either way, as the rain starts to set in and the smell of Lavender/Vanilla softner seeps into my clothes (I so wanna eat my clothes right now) I get myself ready for a wonderful day full of wonderfully goodness. I got in more than a few sit-ups, played mechanic, flirted with the neighbors and am about to make some carrot cake (from the box  don't get excited). If this part of the chain goes well, the next 2 days will make R.Kelly's 5 pt drama seem like a skit from Telletubbies; without the guns and infidelity, of course
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Not this time.. :/
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Posted:Oct 5, 2006 8:43 pm
Last Updated:Oct 13, 2006 2:25 pm
4420 Views
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There is no way you expect me to keep feeling sorry for these people. k, I'm getting ahead of myself...
Wednesday night we had another road fatality which involved a guy on a bike colliding with a bus. Under normal circumstances that would be pretty morbid and kinda sad but when the bike is hittin some pretty high numbers, is on the wrong side of the road coming round a blind corner (possibly overtaking) and the roads aren't the easiest to drive on in that weather... we have to chalk this one up to natural selection. Let's do an experiment to test this theory, shall we
I want you to go into the kitchen (preferably barefoot) and rub some cooking oil on your feet/shoes. Now close your eyes for about 2 seconds while walking. The inevitable result will be that you bump into something, right? There is a small percent that you will slip before you bump but the fact remains that somethin is gonna happen unless you have a Daddy Warbucks size kitchen that can seat an expo.
My day and my music should not be interrupted to tell me that yet another speeder was mushed because sense did not hold true. Chaos theory math time || blind corner + speed - unknown element squared and then invert into pi... or something... whatever. This is one "accident" that I won't lose sleep over. I had a moment of silence for his parents cos it kinda sucks to have to burry your .
please tell me you guys didn't really do the thing with the oil 
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Foreboding Greatness
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Posted:Oct 4, 2006 6:43 am
Last Updated:Oct 9, 2006 8:31 am
4739 Views
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The day I have dreaded has finally shown itself; my is brilliant!! It makes me wonder if I had been around more would be brilliant only by "parents' standards" or would she be like a "Malcom in the Middle" genius.
Her disdain for attention seemed to remind me so much of myself at that age; I guess I was kind of a brainy sight also. What the fuck did I eat to get me here....anyways Now that her potential has shown itself, I have to watch what she eats now; I would rather she followed her own path and not get shoved off like I did.
First she learns to walk, talk and now she's the top of her class. I'm proud of that lil lady
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A good day.... for Spazzing
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Posted:Sep 30, 2006 11:46 am
Last Updated:Oct 4, 2006 5:15 am
4259 Views
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Mmmkay, let's check the list: mistaking a stranger's ass for one you know inside & out (with no smack), playing with my ever growing 4pack in front of a tinted office window, singing "You make Me" by Usher to myself while people in a tinted car are trying to have sex in peace (note the tinted theme so far), trying to go down on someone who was quietly saying they had tummy troubles.
Thursday kicked ass & I'm ready for tomorrow. Huh? Its Saturday already?
shit
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Rugged Loafing
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Posted:Sep 26, 2006 9:53 am
Last Updated:Oct 4, 2006 5:24 am
4387 Views
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After a few beers and a lung full of paint fumes I am totally relaxed (and trippin a bit). Au naturale with my curtains in the washer yet, I am far from concerned.
Except for that elderly stalker.... after the 5th pass in 10 minutes, its just creepy.
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To link to this blog (KMA5) use [blog KMA5] in your messages.
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