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Delia Smith vs. The Real Woman
Delia Smith vs. The Real Woman For my American readers - Delia Smith is considered by some to be a cooking goddess. Personally, I think Nigella Lawson is a cooking goddess, but we need Delia for this blog. Delia's Way Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips. The Real Woman's Way Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for God's sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway. Delia's Way To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. The Real Woman's Way Buy Smash and keep it in the cupboard for up to a year. Delia's Way When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake. The Real Woman's Way Tesco sells cakes. They even do decorated versions. Delia's Way If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a potato slice. The Real Woman's Way If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's tough sh* t. Please recite with me the Real Woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes." ( or the dogs will get it and you can have bread and jam...) Delia's Way Wrap celery in aluminium foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks. The Real Woman's Way It could keep forever. Who eats it? Delia's Way Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. The Real Woman's Way Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and drop it in 8 ounces of vodka. Drink the vodka. You might still have the headache, but you wont give a sh*t! Delia's Way If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy. The Real Woman's Way Why do I have a man cluttering up the place? Finally the most important tip ................. Delia's Way Freeze leftover wine into ice cubes for future use in casseroles. The Real Woman's Way Left over wine???? Hello!?!?!?! |
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THAT BITCH IS FUCKED IN THE HEAD! A. Everyone knows I fucking HATE celery, so if I see it, I'll take the aluminum foil off it. Leave it on the counter. Or maybe in the driveway. And then possibly run it over with the car. B. Rub a lime on my head? Yeah I'll forget all about my headache because I'll be too busy yelling as the ascorbic acid burns through my corneas. C. What's "left over wine'? I've never come across such a thing... and if I did, I'm sure I probably drank it. A P.S. Nakkie Jamie Oliver is the only Chef for me. Although I might just as well press "mute" when I'm watching the show. *drool* Nigella is really good though- certainly better than this dumb lime-rubbing, "left over wine" chick....
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LMAO......Delia is great for the basics but personally I find her cooking way too bland. Nigella is good but I'm sorry the best has to be Gordon Ramsey.
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hahahaha... uhm.... too true??? lol
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6/25/2006 9:35 am |
Excellent!
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