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Blogs > midnightkashmir > Midnight

A brief history in my sexual past  

midnightkashmir 43M
Ask me for a photo
15 posts
8/14/2014 12:11 am
A brief history in my sexual past

I'm going to be very candid here, so I hope you appreciate it.

One of my rules for myself is to not get exposed here, and if certain people see this, they might put two and two together, but I'm taking that chance because I'm pretty sure I'm at the end of my rope. I want to express myself and maybe here, it'll be a bit more discreet.

I lost my virginity at 19. It was EPIC late for what my friends had been up to. Lots of cock blocking on me lead to less of those friends, but I digress. Out of all of us I SHOULD have been the one getting laid.
The girl I lost my virginity to had no idea what she was getting into. I was the nice guy and she was into bad boys, "tattoos make me wet" "MEOW" at a poster of Skinny Puppy. I was the last thing she wanted to fuck, but she liked me, and she was horny and boom, she made the big mistake of showing me her pussy.
She had this thing where if you fucked her for a couple of hours it would start to hurt her and she LOVED it.
I could tell it hurt, but it wouldn't stop me from fucking her because she would still cum another time. One day she told me it hurt, and I slowed down. It was a few sex sessions later when I realized that when she told me it hurt, it meant fuck harder. When I did, even more stars shone. I don't think since then I've seen a girl cum so hard. I WISH I could feel her pussy again that night.

She dumped me of course. I was WAY too sexually needy... and I was WAY too a nice guy. Maybe I could make her cum, but I couldn't get her TO the bed to do so anymore. I was a wus.

Few years later, I met the monster fuck of my life. A cute, hippie girl who could NOT say no. OH we had a lot of sex, and I still admire her for having an imagination. She could have been WAY more aggressive, but once she initiated a 69, and she would say things like "I was thinking about sucking your dick." Things a man DREAMS to hear. It turned out that I wasn't the only man she couldn't say no to. She basically dumped me and said yes to every guy in the area.
Then a loooooong drought. A few one night stands, a half dozen first and last dates and a serious but no penetration sexual relationship and then boom... I met my wife.
We had some... good sex.
Nowadays, it's okay sex... I put my all into it.

Few and far between... no imagination, just keeping me from killing everything in sight. If I have an idea, it's always a no no no....too taboo. "Fuck me in the kitchen?! Are you crazy?!"

But that's just me bitching. The fact is I am GOOD at sex. I just need to find a way to get her to ... maybe get wet because she saw me in some way. If I got buff I know I could fuck her more... if I got off my ass and did some work... it would take a long time, but she would want me to fuck her.
SHE WOULD WANT ME TO FUCK HER!

That's SUCH a weird thing to think.

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