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| Blogs > MyUndoing > Dances With Words |
The AFF Grinch
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The AFF Grinch Every Member On VisionPersonals.com liked Sex a lot... But the Grinch who joined Christmas Eve, Did NOT! The Grinch hated Sex! He hated sex every season! Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason. It could be his libido was really quite slight. It could be, perhaps, that his briefs were too tight. But I think that the most likely reason of all, May have been that his cock was two sizes too small. Whatever the reason, His shorts or his dick, He sat Christmas Eve, intent on being a prick, Staring down at his computer with a sour, Grinchy frown, At beautiful bodies, with every search, to be found. And he knew every member on the VisionPersonals.com site, Was going to try to get laid on Christmas night. "And they're sending messages!" he shrieked like a shrew "It’s Christmas Eve! And they just want to screw!" Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming, "I MUST find some way to stop them from cumming!" For tonight, he knew, the girls and the guys, Their pussies would get wet and their cocks would rise! And then! Oh, the moans! Oh, the moans! Moans! Moans! Moans! That's one thing he hated! The MOANS! MOANS! MOANS! MOANS! Then the horny bunch would get together to touch. And they'd touch! And they'd touch! And they'd TOUCH! TOUCH! TOUCH! TOUCH! Hands grabbing tits and hands stroking dick. Which was something that just made the Grinch feel sick! And THEN They'd do something worse than that pick! Every VisionPersonals.com member, each dude and each chick, Would all get together and their clothes they’d be shucking. They'd be kissing and licking. And then they’d start fucking! They'd fuck! And they'd fuck! And they'd FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! And angered by this, his hands were a wringing And he said to himself, “I must stop them from swinging!” "If I can be celibate so they can be now!" "I MUST stop them from cumming! But HOW?" Then he got an idea! An awful idea! THE GRINCH GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA! "I know just what to do!" The Grinch laughed very mean. And he did a quick search on his computer screen. And he chuckled, and clucked, "I’ll cause them all some distress!" "I’ll write and condemn their wickedness!" "All I need is cock pic..." The Grinch looked down below. But, even with some stroking, it just wouldn’t grow. Did that stop the old Grinch? No! “I won’t be a fraud!”, “They’re much too concerned with the size of their rod!” "I don’t care at all what they think of my dick!" And he pulled down his shorts and snapped a clear pic, After creating his profile he decided to write, A blog about sex that was sure to incite. And his fingers flew without any rest He had to make contact before the fuckfest. When he was finished, he thought with a grin Those VisionPersonals.com members will regret all their sin. Once they read what I’ve written they’ll cover their skin. "You all listen to me," the old prude read aloud, “All of this nudity is no longer allowed.” “You are much too immoral and it’s simply wrong. To post pics of your privates, pussy or dong. And no more tits or ass should be displayed. "And I also insist.... no more getting laid!" Then he continued, after passing some gas, “Yes, you read it right..no more tapping ass! No threesomes! No orgies! No swapping! No porn! No hand jobs! Or blowjobs! No sex in the morn! No more dildos or anal. No bump and no grind. No gangbangs and no bondage of any kind! No spankings. No voyeur or exhibitionist action. No foreplay at all! What is the attraction?? No kama sutra and certainly no bi sex or gay. No doggie style! And not a bit of role play. Absolutely no rimming and NO shades of gray. I don’t care if your fetish is feet or its food. I don’t care how much you think you’re in the mood. I know all about sex, I know every position From a dominant role to that of submission So VisionPersonals.com friends must all now say ‘Adieu!’. Because if I don’t have sex then neither should you! He finished his reading. And then the Grinch waited, Certain to hear of the shame he created. Then he checked for new messages. At first there were none. And he worried that his words would be read by no one! But then it happened as quick as a wink. A message from someone called ‘PrettyInPink’. “Aha! It begins!” he thought with great glee. "And NOW!" grinned the Grinch, "I open and see!" But when the Grinch read these words he was taken aback, ‘You are so funny!” said she, “Let’s hop in the sack!” He thought she can’t mean that, the chances are slim That the words that she wrote were at all meant for him. “Yes, that’s it”, he thought, “She was just mistaken.” And the Grinch carried on although a bit shaken. So he paused for a moment before refreshing the screen. And saw that the messages numbered seventeen. And that old Grinch he laughed, “I’m so smart and so slick”, “They’re now getting the message and getting it quick!” "PoohPooh to VisionPersonals.com!" he was grinchishly humming. "They're finding out now that no one will be cumming!" "I’m impressed with your blog" the next message read, "You know so much about sex so please take me to bed." "I’d like to explore so many things that you’ve said." And in another, “I’ll bet that your dick is impressive when stiff. For your Xmas present, I’ll make you cum in a jiff!” And he opened the next which was more of the same, “I read what you wrote and immediately came!” Each message he read was a clear invitation For sex or at least mutual masturbation No one member at all believed in his condemnation. He stared down at his screen, The Grinch popped his eyes! Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise! Hundreds of messages, and he read quite a few, All of them flattering and “Merry Christmases” too. No one was upset! No one sounded grim! It couldn't be so! But yes, they wanted HIM! He COULDN’T stop them from fucking! No dude or no dame! Somehow or other, they’ll fuck just the same! And the Grinch, with his grinch-hand right down his pants, Sat puzzling and stroking: "Should I take a chance?" And he stroked for three hours, till his cock was quite sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before! "It’s Christmas," he thought, "a time to be glad" "And especially on Christmas...perhaps...sex SHOULD be had!" And what happened then? Well...VisionPersonals.com members say, That the Grinch's small dick Grew ten sizes that day! And that minute his shorts didn't feel quite so tight, Then he shot his load through the bright morning light, And he played on VisionPersonals.com with people til the next December! And he, HE HIMSELF! The Grinch became the hottest member! |
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Woah..I am flabbergasted! I recently stumbled upon your blogs and asked if you wrote the first one I read cause it was so damn clever and well composed..BOOM! You have now blown my tiny mind!!! Greatgooglymoogly!!! I'm rendered speechless...
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When is the movie coming out? Fabulous work! One on one consult - For all your love and relationship needs. The one question challenge - One free question! Ask me anything!
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Bravo... very well done!!  You can visit my blog here FreddiesFling!
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Super!!!
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Very creative, you proofread well saw no typos anywhere in all that print!  Thank you!
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Wow the flow of that is amazing! It all goes together just right, BRAVO! Seriously! Bah-humbug! Presto-chango, give me my 10X size increase! Bawhahahahaha! Greater Than The Sum Of My Constituent Parts! 
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This is fantastic! and hilarious.. Bravo! Visit my blog It's a Mad, Mad, Mad World of NaughtyInSO, leave a comment, become a watcher. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LIVE AND LET LIVE Be happy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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That was very well done, funny as well, thanks for the laughs.
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that was hilarious    je ne regrette rien
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Oh, bravo! This is terrific! Well done! Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Got a kick out of writing it so am glad to see others enjoy it too. Thanks for the kudos, everyone.
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Love this!
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A hilarious masterpiece. Thanks for sharing. My featured post this week: Pulling Fantasy Sex Out of My Ass.
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