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Blogs > khuXBFXM8u > The Down and Dirty

Coerced Into Having Sex
 

khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 12:19 am
    Quoting sweet_VM:
    Always a new world when I see things like that.. hugs V
There are lost of things that fly under the radar, this is just one of them.
Find pleasure in giving pleasure


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 6:30 am
    Quoting  :
Once the study didn't touch on was the sexual orientation of the participants. They did identify that males between 16-24 were most at risk of experiencing the coercion, an suggest wanting to not be judged as being homosexual if they refused the advances, may make them more likely to cave to the coercion attempt.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 6:31 am
    Quoting  :
Yes people definitely can, and history is riddled with examples, some of them of epic proportion.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 6:33 am
    Quoting AmeliaCox:
    I'm aware of three instances of such happening... I was sickened. No means NO, for both sexes, not just one way.
Some people, even those who profess to be enlighten still cling to double standards. No definitely means NO.
Find pleasure in giving pleasure


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 6:35 am
    Quoting AmeliaCox:
    Fear can trigger involuntary erections in men... Women with knives can be very intimidating.
Mel, for some it's definitely difficult to let go of long held beliefs, especially when it come to the sexual arena.
Find pleasure in giving pleasure


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 6:49 am
    Quoting lil_whimsical:
    Seduction isn't coercion, in my opinion.
    Alcohol, I don't really buy either. Alcohol may lower inhibitions, but men don't typically function very well sexually when they've had too much to drink. aka "Whisky Dick."

    I've heard a lot of women claim to have been r-ped or d-r-ped, and I don't buy it. Unless there was a weapon, they knocked you unconscious, Roofied you, or are holding your kids hostage - if you don't have physical bruises, scrapes, and rug burns, you consented.

    This "coercion" language is a really bad idea. People are free to say yes or no to sex. Giving in to pressure, feeling bad for someone, being seduced is NOT coercion.
Coercion: to compel by force, intimidation, or authority, especially without regard for individual desire or volition... that the definition!

Can someone be intimidated without treat of violence into doing something... It happens daily. It may not happen to those who have stronger will (like you or as easily, but can you honestly say that you have never be coerced into doing something (no sexual) you didn't want to do Often the choice is made to comply, because it become a choice of the lessor of 2 evils. Because we are talking about sex, touching and kissing (do make the big "R" the focus of the argument, because it is not the focus of this post), those same forces don't just evaporate?

If this post was about men coercing women into having sex, the comments would be different. Should the situation be judged differently because the gender roles are reversed. That's a double standard my friend.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 6:52 am
    Quoting  :
Yes, the study identified that. Look at the backlash in this post. Now imagine the young man can't bear to be thought of a gay. Certainly when word gets out that he refused, he may have to face that situation, and it become the choice of the lessor of 2 evils.
Find pleasure in giving pleasure


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/10/2014 7:03 am
    Quoting  :
Missy, recognizing that this issue flies under the radar doesn't diminish the fact that acts of sexual assault are perpetrated against women on the daily.

As I said previously, I think its a socialization process, why the men are not affected in the same manner. It's always amazed me how people can't look at things objectively, because of pre-conceived notions and stereotyping. Like when a sexual assault happens, they investigate the victim's sexual past. To be blunt, if someone say NO, what they have done in the past doesn't make it OK for the NO to be ignored.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/11/2014 11:34 am
    Quoting  :
J. another example of this situation. I wish people would stop trying to always apply stereotypes to every situation, and believing it is gospel.
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TXArmyWife 51F
1964 posts
7/11/2014 12:45 pm

 Wow! This discussion has angered me! Like you said, if the roles were reversed, things would be sooo much different!

I'm really hoping that the word coercion is being used because this site won't let us use the r word. Because that is what it is! People that think men can't be rped, are ridiculous. Yes, men can get an erection when they don't want to!

I understand the people don't take this seriously, but to say, I wish someone would coerce me, is saying you want to be rped. The fact that men don't take it emotionally, like women do, does not make it any less horrible!

I am done.
I need a really great kiss!!


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/12/2014 12:33 am
    Quoting TXArmyWife:
    Wow! This discussion has angered me! Like you said, if the roles were reversed, things would be sooo much different!

    I'm really hoping that the word coercion is being used because this site won't let us use the r word. Because that is what it is! People that think men can't be rped, are ridiculous. Yes, men can get an erection when they don't want to!

    I understand the people don't take this seriously, but to say, I wish someone would coerce me, is saying you want to be rped. The fact that men don't take it emotionally, like women do, does not make it any less horrible!

    I am done.
No this post wasn't about "R', is was about coercion, and an academic study about it. Some just ran in the "R' direction. Anyone, male or female, can be sexually assaulted by another person (male or female), it is a fact. Men can become hard against their will... and a hard-on can also be inducted by medication (the famous little blue pile, and it's competitors), no different than the date "R' drugs used on women.

I didn't get from the study that men don't take it emotionally... it just doesn't see to have the debilitating self-esteem challenges that women who are victims of coercion or out and out sexual-assault have.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/12/2014 12:34 am
    Quoting  :
Sorry to disappoint.
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hotsandy5 49F
10514 posts
7/12/2014 4:53 pm

 Interesting post.
Hugs!
A única alegria isenta de amargura é a de bem proceder.


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/13/2014 5:39 pm
    Quoting  :
Brilliantly stated.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/13/2014 5:42 pm

 Thanks... an interesting and overlooked topic.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/24/2014 6:35 pm
    Quoting  :
Not if it's someone you didn't want to get with.
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librarian_girl83 40F  
32 posts
7/27/2014 11:24 am

 No one gets coerced or tricked into having sex. If there is no other influences to create an out come, you have sex cause you want to.


rm_houman4you 59M
23 posts
7/29/2014 8:28 pm

 In college, a girl who had a crush on me wouldn't take no for an answer after a party. I really was interested in someone else and not her. But I am a male and gave in to her pressure. It's not so great if you're not really into it. Of course now a days I should be so lucky.


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/29/2014 9:04 pm
    Quoting librarian_girl83:
    No one gets coerced or tricked into having sex. If there is no other influences to create an out come, you have sex cause you want to.
It's a common misconception. If you read through the comments you will see a comment from someone who attempted to coerce a friend into it, and one from a mother who's child was the target of a coercion attempt.
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/29/2014 9:06 pm

 So true!
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khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
7/29/2014 9:08 pm
    Quoting rm_houman4you:
    In college, a girl who had a crush on me wouldn't take no for an answer after a party. I really was interested in someone else and not her. But I am a male and gave in to her pressure. It's not so great if you're not really into it. Of course now a days I should be so lucky.
It can be tough to stand your ground... but stand your ground you must.
Find pleasure in giving pleasure


khuXBFXM8u 62M
10296 posts
8/7/2014 10:24 pm
    Quoting  :
Well yes... if women can be coerced into having sex then so can men. But smooth taking is more along the lines of seduction, where coercion is more of a veiled or direct threat.
Find pleasure in giving pleasure


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