Hookup, Find Sex or Meet Someone Hot Now
Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
Hookup, Find Sex or Meet Someone Hot Now
| Blogs > As_Beauty_Does2 > My Blog |
Love drama? Go on a first date.
|
Love drama? Go on a first date. Love Drama? Go On A First Date (From tragedy to parody and everything in between. My rambling on the use, misuse, and over-use, of the word "drama".) A new commercial is out that starts off saying, "Love drama? Go on a first date." I love parody! Let me preface this by saying... I'm not out to cause more turmoil and chaos than life already delivers. There is more than enough of that already. The reasonably healthy responsible person has or will encounter plenty of that to try to put into order. I also will not refer to those feelings which are a predictable natural response as a healthy human being to current challenges in life and behaviors of others as *drama*. The fact that someone still feels the natural healthy spectrum of emotions and a predictable response is not "drama" ...It's being alive...it's a damned miracle these days. And things not going the way we hoped or wanted is not "drama". It is disappointment, delay, delayed gratification, stress, discouragement, loss, new dreams needing to be formed, and sometimes even distressing pain, traumatic upheaval, real heartbreak or tragedy (ie death of a loved one). Divorce has been described sometimes as a tearing, resembling an attack on one's own flesh, sometimes more elaborate strategic survival moves and bureaucratic paperwork than fighting of a hostile corporate takeover. If someone is going through a divorce, and you don't want to risk getting too close or romantic entanglements during that vulnerable chaotic time, say so. But dont say, "I really don't want to get involved in your *drama*." It's insulting, callous and cruel. I also do not believe in using the phrase "I don't want or like drama, and negative people" to avoid adult behavioral responsibility for my own words, actions, and inactions... That would be lacking self-accountability, vapid, and insulting. Especially when even a two-year-old could have predicted and recognized that my bad behavior WILL do damage and effect others, then they naturally might get very upset and have a highly emotional negative response... Simple solution, stop repeatedly doing things to hurt or piss people off. "I don't like drama" sounds like "I can't tie my own shoe strings," or "I play in the cat litter box...Why do I smell poo?" Simple cause-and-effect, the natural consequence of ones own actions. Whenever someone has very little on a profile, what they list is usually going to be regarded as the most important factors and the reoccuring issues to them. Each time someone sends an emails to me for the first time, I read his or her profile before I reply. If the profile is very short and says "no drama", I think, "Oh here it comes. Should I duck-and-cover now?" And sure enough... If that person did not get what he or she wanted after the first email, the next email would be rude, a childish tantrum, or flat-out abusive. Drama can also mean making a huge deal over something the has very little real or lasting consequence and expecting everyone else to curtail to your wishes... Hmmm, does sum buwdy nweed a time out? If we don't want any "drama", then maybe we should be honest, reliable, accountable, reasonable, respectful, stable, law-abiding, non-egotistical, of cheerful spirit, try to treat people with some consideration, and behave like we want them to enjoy themselves. Right? Well the trouble is we have all been on a first date where the other person did the opposite of that. Maybe even to such an outlandish extreme that (once we have recovered from the event) the person seemed like a caricature or cartoon character. Then there is the Drama Queen. I have a friend who is a high maintenance Drama Queen every moment of her life. It's annoying. But I can be annoying too...it is not all of the time (at least I hope not, haha) . I have my moments, and it is very specific moments. Certain things, I have my small number of idiosyncrasies. Case in point, my birthday... Every time my birthday comes along, I buy a little box of my favorite chocolate. A specific brand of chocolate, only THAT brand, and ONLY in their Dark Chocolate-dipped plump bing Cherries preserved in real Russian brandy (which just happens to only come in a six-count box). On a quest I will search all over the county for them until I get one. Family and friends make fun of me over it, and I make fun of myself over it. But no one is insulted or hurt, except maybe the six cherries.  Heck yes I know I am acting rediculous like a caricature or cartoon character. Once acquired, I look around with feigned paranoid suspicion and protectively cradle the little silver and gold filigree painted box, look at it intensely as if adoringly obsessed while petting it and (like Smeagol) say "My Precious!" ...Just to be silly. But I don't think that is the kind of drama the commercial meant...unless someone takes me out on my birthday and buys me the wrong chocolate. Jk! Drama is a stage show, the habit of confusing stirring-the-pot (without seeking to address and resolve a real difficulty or accomplish something solid) with being some sort of *entertainment*, passion, or excitement. The habit of being more comfortable in creating chaos, damage, and conflict than in creating solutions, resolutions, health and peace. Well, believe me...I've had enough "excitement" from others and life, and I like boring. Frankly I fantasize about boring... Fantisize about a nice "dull" non-dysfunctional evening... Fantasize about a world where I can go to the grocery store (or anywhere else) and not encounter the violence of someone mental who is beating on a girlfriend (or anyone) half their size in the parking lot. Fantasize about a world where people don't just keep walking by doing nothing to help. My evening starts off with a call to law enforcement and ends with her words, "Thank you. I didn't know anyone cared anymore," hitting me somewhere I can't forget. I lost count of how many times I have heard that phrase. I fantasize about a world where no one has to say that, where no one experiences being or feeling that alone. An officer asked a group coming out of the grocery what they saw. (The same group had seen everything, had walked right by on their way in and done nothing.) They replied "We don't want to get involved in the *drama*". If eyes could have shot someone dead. So sorry that having a spine would be such an inconvenience for you. I had to say to her, "I am sorry for every time, so many times, someone just kept walking". I fantasize about a world where such a simple no-brainer of doing the right thing is just done, never treated as the last thing someone would ever do. Not treated as a rediculously impossible difficulty or inconvenience where clearly something else was more "important". I know I am not perfect, but still...sometimes I am so disgusted by the behavior and dog-eat-mentality of so many members of my species, that I don't like people very much. I am ashamed to call myself human...it feels like being called a planetary infestation and parasite. With that thought on my mind, I get home and turn on the TV. Narrator, "Biologists once considered the eating of an individual's own species a behavioral mistake made by animals that were unnaturally overcrowded. But after new analyses, the puzzle is why it does not occur more often". Whoa! Now that was *dramatic*. Shudder. No...it was an irony. And I am a horrible disturbed disgusting terrible person for even thinking it had anything even remotely to do with my train of thought. Well, whatever it was it creeped me out. And everybody else thought it was funny. That's it. I'm not watching TV anymore. It's the TV's fault, so I am ending our "relationship" because that inanimate block of electronic hardware is being too *dramatic*.
|
|||
|
Thank you a_frenchkiss for the comment. I am still tickled and laugh every time I read your, "Sweet Jesus", reaction. Happy to have at least caused a ripple or added a little enjoyment to your day. Language gripes can be more than irritations. It is far too easy to forget the responsibility that comes with language. When we lose the meaning of words, we lose their power and someone else may have power over us. When we no longer can examine ourselves or critically evaluate, challenge, and reason what people are saying, then we will not even understand what rights may be being stripped away as we remain complacent. Rights that have been hard won at great expense. What we enjoy now comes from the culmination of lengthy battles of reason and in blood that may go as far back as to the beginning of the spoken and written word. Changes fought for after innocent lives were lost when nothing was in place to even call it a right or protect them. And every warrior who gave all they had, sacrificed time away from family, everything they earned, years in their lives, or lost life itself...Be it the civilian who challenges failings in social justice, a legal advocate, law enforcement, or a soldier. We may say "Never Forget". But if we wish to honor and respect that vow, we cannot forget the responsibility and power that comes from meaning and words. We cannot forget to in some way practice the skill, exercise that ability, and do so productively. And we must not forget to teach that ability and its importance to the next generation... So I will continue to try to "take down" like a big cat on a gazelle.
|
Become a member to create a blog
