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Blogs > spiderj72 > Going to Hell for sure

Lies  

spiderj72 51M
5951 posts
2/8/2016 5:39 pm
Lies

So to start off I am kinda back. I never really left but lurked and didn't really post just out of respect for the relationship I was in. That relationship has since flared out and I a currently sifting through the debris and trying to figure out what went wrong and there are glaring problems but nothing we could really do about it, more on that later.

Today I had a friend come to me with an issue and I helped her with that issue but it also resonated in my head because of something I had heard. I listen to Joe Rogans podcast. If you haven't listened to it I suggest you do. There is an incredible breadth of topics covered and even if you don't like his UFC stuff you might dig his comedy, or his access to movers and shakers in education and psychology.

The episode I am thinking of had Illiza Schlesinger as the guest. You can find this on youtube like I did. She related a story of meeting and guy and he started the relationship with a lie and down the road how badly it blew up in their faces and ultimately the hurt she had about the lies and the relationship.

Now I have talked about this before on this site. I know it is a dating site and everyone has their own little lies or omissions that they use. I will be totally up front and say I don't post my face or my body in my picture for a few reasons. The first I that I am in a relatively small town and don't want this coming back at me. Not the stigma of a dating site but the fact that my sexual preferences are out there for the world to see.

Secondly I am a fat fuck and really don't have any amazing pics to show you all. I don't have a giant cock to show off and really feel that being honest with you potential suitors is preferable to you expecting a six pack and cock that needs its own area code. That is ultimately what I comes down to. These sites are meant to produce meetings and hopefully very fulfilling relationships and sexual encounters.

What do I gain by lying to you and then at the meet up you realize that I am not an Adonis but instead a very human being. I know my flaws and my favors and know full well the sense of disappointment when a meet up leads to some of the things I thought I knew about a person falling through. Hey she isn't a blonde but instead a brunette. Hey she isn't 35 but instead about ten years older. And these are just the visual things. Imagine once you get down into personality lies and omissions.

Suddenly everything becomes suspect. Everything that he or she said is up to scrutiny. Are they really single? Are they really just a social drinker? Are they really disease free? Are they really into that mutual fetish that you are into? These are things that suddenly become shaky especially when the straight bio information is based on a lie.

Tell me what you think? I have some more thoughts about the kink and fetish stuff and when it needs to be revealed. I am curious to know what you all think. And be gentle this is my first blog in a goddamn long time. More to come I think.

SimplyinBC 47F  
502 posts
2/8/2016 8:42 pm

 Why bother?!

I'm always baffled by people who choose to lie about something that often is easily discovered. Whether it's for a relationship or a friendship, lying is not the way to get there.

"I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor

Welcome back despite the unfortunate circumstances.


JJLooken 56M/46F
366 posts
2/9/2016 5:17 am

 You lie to cover the first lie and need to lie to try to remember the last lie. It is a Vicious circle of life the lie game. It Never ends and in the end you only have your reputation to stand by or behind. And gto many just Don't seem to care.


spiderj72 51M
7898 posts
2/9/2016 5:50 am
    Quoting  :
it was funny how strong that story resonated with me. a smart together woman fooled from the get go but more interesting was the fallout a year later. its good to be back.


spiderj72 51M
7898 posts
2/9/2016 5:51 am
    Quoting  :
thanks for the two pennies. I understand the tactful lie, the avoidance of potential strife but yeah it will all come down around your ears.


spiderj72 51M
7898 posts
2/9/2016 5:54 am
    Quoting SimplyinBC:
    Why bother?!

    I'm always baffled by people who choose to lie about something that often is easily discovered. Whether it's for a relationship or a friendship, lying is not the way to get there.

    "I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor

    Welcome back despite the unfortunate circumstances.
circumstances are circumstances. it might give me something to write about. I don't know if lying will ever get you there outside of politics.


spiderj72 51M
7898 posts
2/9/2016 5:55 am
    Quoting JJLooken:
    You lie to cover the first lie and need to lie to try to remember the last lie. It is a Vicious circle of life the lie game. It Never ends and in the end you only have your reputation to stand by or behind. And gto many just Don't seem to care.
There certainly is a circular nature to it. I wonder if these folks ever actually know who they really are or not?


spiderj72 51M
7898 posts
2/10/2016 5:39 am
    Quoting 2000_Man:
    Even in politics it's the lie that brings you the most trouble not the initial wrong.
being as apolitical a I can be I will have to take your word for it. one of my favorite things right now is the fact that some groups are fact checking the debates. no matter how confidently they say it still doesn't make it true.


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