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| Blogs > StL_Dom_AssMan > Inside Lookin Out |
My Journey
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My Journey My Journey started as soon as I stepped into Lambert Airport. I hadn't been on a plane since '06 so just being in there was invigorating. While I waited, I got a call from a group friend. We didnt talk long, but it is always good to hear her voice. After that short talk, I called the female I was closest to at that time from the group. I wanted to let her know I was leaving. she already knew it was probably going to happen, but I didnt let her know it was definite until I was sure it was definite. I always get nervous about flying, but our conversation put me in a very relaxed state. Even though our relationship was only cyber (thats another blog entry) we had a pretty strong connection. I could hear she was a little sad. That made me a little sad too. But the conversation went well and ended well. That put me in a even better mood. Boarding time. I hadnt been more than 40 miles in any direction from home in more than 3 years. The first leg of my flight, into Salt Lake City, was about 1200 miles. The furthest west I had EVER been of St Louis was Sewer...oops Sioux City, Iowa. Every part of the country I would see from here on out, will be my very first time seeing it. I cant explain how excited I was, but you wouldnt know it by looking at me. Its the No Limit Texas Hold 'em player in me. The flight was easy, or as easy as a flight can be for me. I had my 'what if a screw comes loose somewhere in the engine' moment, then got out of my own head. Looking down at the clouds was simply awesome. The Sun seemed to be right next to us. It was all relaxing and sort of ho hum until we got into Utah. I had never seen mountains before and did not mentally prepare myself to see them. Even if I had tried, I couldnt prepare for that site. Simply amazing... Even though it was dark, that didnt matter at all. They almost didnt seem real. It was kind of like seeing a computer animated scene of mountains. The way they made me feel inside was proof to me that they were real. I wish I could have seen more of them, but someday. That little glimpse was very awakening to my soul. The layover was short and easy. Time for the 1850 mile flight to Spokane. 'No problem, the first plane didnt go down so this one probably wont either.' I was even more at peace during that flight. While in the air, I started to get mentally ready to meet this female who I have only known on the 'net for about 2 weeks. I was ready as I was ever going to be. We landed (whew!) in Spokane and reality really hit home. 'I'm am about 1500 miles from home and my well being is almost entirely in the hands of a stranger.' If I wanted to try trusting my intuition and people again, this was defintely one way to test both. Oddly enough, I was not worried at all...about anything. |
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I absolutely felt empowered ms. b You have to understand that for the 2+ years before this experience, I was almost completely walled in from everyone except tiger and allie, a couple of real life friends, the group, and a particular group member or 2. In my opinion, I was barely living life. It is definitely not healthy for a free spirit to stop roaming free. If you know me and some of the things I have experienced in life, you would know that it would take something major to zap me out of the state I was in. I liken taking this trip to skydiving with a with an unknown partner in charge of the littlr flyin' thingy. 
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The journey is just as important as the destination. And I am glad you found something amazing on your way to your destination. Here I Am Practice What You Preach   
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con... I saw alot of amazing things that I will write about. mel...I had stopped trusting everything. I had to do this, exactly the way it all happened. I felt this whole thing was a result of me being in tune with The Universe. If I couldnt trust that then there would be little hope for me.
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